MM got busted... please read!!
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MM got busted... please read!!
| Sun, 09-07-2003 - 7:52am |
I haven't been on here in a while, but here's a quick rundown- MM has children, and I have a child. MM and I have been doing this for about 8 months now, and during that time, we have completely fallen in love with each other, mind, body, and soul. We met at our special place yesterday, and there was a woman there who used to know MM's W. Well, come to find out, while MM and I were together, she actually freaking called his W and told her she saw him!! OMG... so, when MM got home, W asked to see his bag to find out what he was wearing... apparently, the woman had told his W what he was wearing. OMG... he called me and told me about it yesterday, and we couldn't talk for long but he was so shaken up. He told me to turn my cell phone off while I'm at home just in case she were to find any bills of his that had my phone number on it. My H has absolutely no idea what's going on. So.. that's the only "proof" that W has. I hope that MM knows to Deny, Deny, Deny. I guess she asked him who it was, and he refused to say anything- he is going to keep me out of this and deal with it on his own somehow. I'm just afraid for him because I don't want to lose his kids. I love him so much, that if I knew there was a chance that they will be able to work it out and he won't lose anything, I would walk away forever. That's how much I love him. Of course, I don't want to lose him, but if that's what I need to do, then I'll do it. I don't know what's going through his mind right now. I won't be able to talk to him until next week. I'm so scared... could this be the end between MM and me??

I have no advice or insight... just wanted to say I'm so sorry you're going through such a tough time right now. I'm sure if you and MM have as strong a R as you imply, that you will weather this. It will just take time, and maybe a break in your R for him to get things figured out on his end. You can not be responsible for his R w/his W or what happens there, so just continue to take care of yourself and your side of things. And stay strong. You know he *will* contact you as soon as he can.
take care,
lily
I'm sorry to hear that things are not good at present... take a little heart though... it doesn't always have to be the end of things... but I'm pretty sure that damage control needs to be done... absolutely certain actually... and therefore you may need to remain distant from one another.
I'm been through this myself... caught by DH... while not caught physically... he had enough info to know for sure. I made changes... but could not let go of MM... that was about 2 and a half years ago now. I am much more aware of things... and not to mention that I don't want my marriage to end... so am very careful.
It can be worked through... but you will have to give it time... and that's going to be hard. Stay strong... he will get in contact with you as soon as it's possible for him.
luv and hugs
Sweet
Sweet
Co-Community Leader My
so much together already, we need each other in our lives. I'm just going to wait for
him to contact me. Even though we both work together, I am lucky for that, I suppose.
At least I'll be able to see him tomorrow. But I will let him make the first move-
whether it be an email, phone call, or him simply walking up to my desk. I just
feel so bad for him right now. I hope she isn't going psycho on him- hitting or destroying
his stuff or anything. I have a feeling he's still at home though, because if she
threw him out, then he would absolutely be able to contact me. I'm ready for NC, and
I'm trying to prepare myself for the worst. I'm just glad that we were able to spend
quite a while with each other yesterday- it was so amazing in so many ways. If that was
the last time that we'll ever be with each other, I can deal with it. I'll have to.
His smile... god, I can't resist his smile. All I need is for him to smile at me and I'll
know that everything is right in the world. I'm going to bed early tonight- because
it'll make Monday morning come faster and at least I'll be able to see him in
my dreams. I can't believe I'm already listening to sad music....like that's going to
make me feel any better. Thanks so much for your support... I'm hoping that this is not
the end and there will be good times once again. I'm willing to wait as long as
it takes.
Complicated
Best Luck to you....
Ps.. I have also posted for advise on my issues and got great advises hope you do tooo but i guess at this moment all we can tell our friends here is "GIRL'S BE CAREFUL SERIOUSLY IT LOOKS LIKE THE WORLD IS WATCHING" just keep all lyour tracks clear girls.
Marubaby
My MM had that same philosophy, sabotage the marriage and she'll kick him out, then it'll be her decision and not his, and he'll feel better about leaving his kids. But when push came to shove and his W did tell him he wants a D he got scared I think, she has since told him about 3 times that she wants a D, and his excuse is.. he can't do that to his kids. for about 16 months that's all we talked about (our future together) but I had to decide at some point how long I'd stay and if I'd stay whether or not he left. So here I am in a happier place knowing that whether or not he leaves we're together and theres no expectations.
How long have you been waiting for MM? I told MM the other day he needs to "be a Man" and stop letting his W make all the decisions, he was surprised but agreed... not that he'll do anything about it.. and the thing is... my MM's W makes more money then he does, so her taking him to the cleaners isn't an issue for him, but I think the fact that his standard of living will be affected is a big factor that he'll never admit.
=)