my be venting later

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2003
my be venting later
Sun, 04-04-2004 - 8:23am
Good morning guys.Ok I knew my om was a playa.We were supposed to be just sex.He had been flirting with a freind of ours.He always flirts.Thursday we were hot and heavy on the couch and had to stop because H came in.He called her and was talking game.She came over last night.He was flirting with her but steady watching me.Still couldn't take his eyes of me.I gave her a muscle relaxer and she was out.So she spent the night.I don't know that anything happened.I know I'm jealous as hell.I was awake all night feeling like my heart might break.We'll see how he acts when she goes home.H theory is he flirts and toys with her as a cover.She's(shontae) black.She ,her sister and a friend are the ones who suspect something.Oh one came out right and asked my /h are Renee and Lee F*****?I was floored.Shontae and jh grew up together.She told Leonard(H).I'll find out if there's something going on.Thgey are like brother and sister.

I was bad too.OM and H were saying one night I'd look good with my hair colored black.H has said this for the longest.Last night had her color it black.OMG he really can't keep his eyes of me afterwards.I came out and the expression on his face said it all.He tried to cover his reaction by laughing and asking if I thought I was cher.H said go put on some makeup so I can see how you look.OM saw me in the mirror putting it on.He watched for a minute and smiled.When I came out I saw him turn away and run his teeth over his bottom lip.Payback is a bitch.I'm going to lay out today .I have a cute black bikini.(I just dropped 60 pounds).He loves it.

The last cookout.He spent lots of time talking to her.I was turning out lights locking up.He said come here.You know how it is I was mad but couldn't refuse him.He wanted to play.He said I know I'm wrong I'm sorryand he held me close for a minute I was taken aback by this comment.So I think they had been playing with words flirting H was with them most of there conversation.He was feeling guilty.Later today if he tries to come to me we'll see how he acts and if he acts the same way.I plan on asking him why is it so damn had for you to admit you want me and quit fighting what you feel.I want to be sitting in his lap facing him when I ask him.

I knew how he was/is.I think he very scared of what he feels for me and the intensity of the passion between us.I still believe my color is part of it.If something did happen I'll put him out for good.I won't help him get on his feet.I'll post again later.Hopefully it will be good not bad.

Renee