my oh my!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2004
my oh my!
1
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 4:46pm
Why is it that these men always come back? I mean, I am the MW and now he is single (divorcing wife (long story)) but he leaves the A with NC for days on end and just when I've had it, I mean I'm done, he comes back. It may be for a small dose of us or for a longer period of time but he's always coming back.

I guess I should tell my story! I am in a long-term A. I met him and his wife and we all became great friends. He and I talked and laughed just got along great. My H and I were having problems...his wife and he were having problems..we ended up getting involved, he even told me he loved me.

He and his W split up then reconciled. My H and I split up and reconciled...all at different times and for different reasons. For some reason the OM and I always end up getting back together. The "L" word isn't mentioned when we're with our H/W. Anyways, he and his wife split again...this time for good. He and I were already seeing each other again.

Things got sticky, we started fighting...he brought up "love" again but then is telling me how he needs to date other people. He knows he can't have a relationship with me because I'm married.

I get over the jealousy, the desire to be with him more. Then he meets a girl (the 1st one since his wife left him) and he becomes short and mean. Stops calling me back, basically NC. He finally admits that he's met someone that he likes, that he was beginning to see himself wanting to be with me...knowing how good we would be together so he's pulled away and invested himself in this new relationship. I am happy that he's found someone but I have that void. You know the one...he used to call me every morning just to say "hi." God I miss those things...just the little things!

Anyway, I finally got PO'd because he didn't tell me that we weren't speaking anymore, he just disappeared. I would finally get to the point where I knew it was over and I'd not contact him for a couple of days and guess what! That's when I would hear from him!

I gave in and saw him yesterday! Great, great and great...always is with him...but again NC since yesterday. I am determined not to cave, I will not get angry, I will not give in! I want to be with him like it was before...phone calls every now and then, a sweet text, getting together when we both can but this not hearing anything until he worries that I may be gone for good is very trying on my nerves.

Anyway....like to hear from you men out there on why he may be doing this...I mean I have my theories but I've not got a couple hangin so give me some input!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2004
In reply to: o2bflirt
Thu, 04-01-2004 - 4:53pm