My Plan

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2003
My Plan
4
Mon, 04-12-2004 - 12:42am
Hey everybody,



Well, i still havent heard from MM since his so called friend tried to blackmail me and i sent MM a message telling him what was happening and left a short message on his answer machine asking him to call me but he never did. I do know that the so called friend did not tell him the story just yet but he did IM me telling me that MM is avoiding him at work and he thinks it is best to go ahead and tell MM about his blackmailing and etc because he doesnt care if him and MM's friendship breaks up. Also i sent MM several IM's way back when this first happened and the only way i could find out if he got them was to send him a email and see if it would bounce back to me and guess what it didnt, which means MM has gotten every IM and email i have sent him. Well, i have been trying to move on keeping myself busy so i dont think about MM or the A, so i was talking to one of my guy friends one nite and he said he would help me find out what was going on with MM since MM wont answer my calls and plus he knows MM b/c they used to work together and when something was bothering MM about his Marriage, job etc, he would go and ask for advice from this friend so i thought about it and figured i dont have anything else to lose, havent heard from MM in a month and a half so i said yes find out what's up and if he still wants this b/c i need to know so i dont waste anymore time on MM. Well the guy friend called MM at his house and they talked about what was happening at the job and etc. So the friend asked MM if we were still seeing each other and if we wasnt then he was interested since he saw me in my hometown and i have gotten hotter since the last time he saw me (he was trying to make MM jealous and make him wake up and realize what a good thing he has/or had with me, well that didnt go so well b/c MM didnt even answer the question if we were still together, all MM said was that he didnt have to ask his permission, that he could date who he wanted to date and then MM said i dont wont to talk about her anymore. The guy friend said he didnt sound mad or anything just perturbed, after that the guy friend said MM was trying to get off the phone after he asked that question. So here i am thinking the other guy would at least get the answers i needed to move on and MM didnt even tell him if it was over between us. This is so confusing, i know this is probably the kind of stuff we did back in high school and it might seem a little childish but all i wanted to know is If it's over completely between us and that was my last resort but still no answer. I dont know what to do, would anybody else pull this trick or was it going a little to far? I need alot of advice on this guys and dolls, thanks for your time and hope to hear from everyone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: ah_georgiapeach24
Mon, 04-12-2004 - 1:14am


MM did answer the question in man speak when he told his friend to go for it (he didnt have to ask his permission) add that to 6 weeks of silence ....you deserve better treatment then this at least a proper ending.

Sorry

F

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2003
In reply to: ah_georgiapeach24
Mon, 04-12-2004 - 3:11pm
Hey thanks for responding and yes you are probably right but knowing MM the way i do, when the other friend called and asked if we were still together MM wouldve just said no we arent and u can have her flat out but he didnt he just said u dont have to ask for my permission, date whoever you want to date, knowing MM like i thought i did, he wouldve just been blunt and said how he felt about it, instead of acting perturbed and trying to avoid the question which is exactly what he did. The other guy said he gave him enough time to answer if we were still together and MM just made his comment and said i dont wont to talk about it and changed the subject. I know that if that wouldve happened to me and a girl was asking me about MM i would probably say the same thing, do what u want to do, date whoever u want to, so yea i do think MM was shocked and wasnt ready to hear that the other guy is also interested in me, maybe he knows now that i am not going to wait on him and that i have plenty of opportunites with other guys besides MM, i thought this would be a wake up call for MM but apparently not. As for me it has and so as hard as it is, i am moving on to bigger and better things. I know i have been there for him when he needed me the most and i tried my best to keep the A together, i gave him all my time and energy and my heart but i wont be doing that anymore. I am hurt and only time will heal my pain but i have always been a strong person this now is just going to test how strong i really am. Oh, if everbody is wondering why it's bothering me that he wont give me a proper goodbye is b/c my H left me in the beginning of our marriage, just came home, packed his things and moved back to his hometown, i was without a H for 9 mths, he never even gave me a explanation so i feel maybe this is why it bothers me with MM is b/c i feel like from ex-boyfriends, husband, and now MM has just walk out and left me without saying it's over or kiss my a.., it has always been this way so that's why i am determined to get the answers i need for me. I have been let down by almost every man i have been with and now MM doing this just makes it worse, i feel like maybe there's something wrong with me, maybe these "men" think i cant handle the truth but i can, i just wish they would grow balls and be a man instead of acting like a little boy. This comment is not for every man species just for the ones who have been in my life. sorry so long just needed to vent. hope to hear more on this topic. later guys and dolls.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
In reply to: ah_georgiapeach24
Mon, 04-12-2004 - 7:46pm
Hey Peach

Thers's nothing thing wrong with you, just hold out for a better quality of male, OH and count them balls the first time he drops his drawers. LOL :-)

F

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-29-2003
In reply to: ah_georgiapeach24
Mon, 04-12-2004 - 11:41pm
Yea maybe there isnt anything wrong with me, i am a caring,loyal,always put others first kind of gal and i like being that way, as for counting the balls when another man drops his drawers, yep i will definitely do that next time. I just dont know what he expected of me, maybe he felt that since he told me where i stood and how he feels about me, that maybe it would shut me up for awhile but it didnt. I deserve a explanation and yes i willing to realize that i may never hear it but you know what, i gave him something his W never did and i was there for him when he needed me. I gave the relationship 100% and i am not going to let him think he has won b/c i know it may not be tommorrow or a month from now but one day he will look back and regret ever losing me. I just need to be strong even though i want to call him and just talk to him but i will not do that b/c he knows i will, this time i am going to prove him wrong and if he does come back, he better start showing me he loves me instead of just telling me. Thanks again for your reply to my post and hope to hear more from you other guys and dolls.