My story (sorry this is very long)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
My story (sorry this is very long)
8
Fri, 01-16-2009 - 11:07pm
I have been lurking on this board for a while now.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
Sat, 01-17-2009 - 12:25am
As Dr. Phil said.....kids would rather be from a broken home than live in one. I'm not one for necessarily telling someone to end a marriage, but from the sounds of it, yours just may be one I would. It sounds like you've tried to communicate with him and turn things around, but this guy's head is in the sand. If it were me, I would leave. You don't have the worries other women do about not being ok financially, etc. He may say it's all his, but a judge just may see it differently.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
Sat, 01-17-2009 - 9:42am
Thank for the advise, I guess its just about me getting to a place where I can emotional be strong enough to do this.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2007
Sat, 01-17-2009 - 11:20pm
You sound like you've been thinking it over for a long time and now it's just come down to the how to make it happen part. Here's a site that has some good information: http://www.divorce360.com/divorce-articles/child/custody/child-centered-divorce-custody.aspx?artid=737
Hope it helps you with your decision. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
Sun, 01-18-2009 - 7:51pm

i am new here, but reading your story i had to write.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2009
Sun, 01-18-2009 - 8:23pm

I too think that you need to leave your marriage. You are not doing your kids any favors by remaining in this relationship. You can both still be good parents separately. Perhaps even better parents than you were together.

Do you live in a no-fault divorce state? I just went through a divorce also. Most states are no-fault but some are not. If you do not live in a no-fault divorce state, and your H is able to find out about/prove that you are having an A, this could enter into the equation (meaning the courts would lean in his favor in terms of settlement, perhaps custody issues, etc).

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2008
Sun, 01-18-2009 - 8:42pm
I think you are finally discovering your 'Self'
Don't let money and material things cloud your judgment.
Good Luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2009
Sun, 01-18-2009 - 9:17pm

I do feel like I am on a path to finding my "SELF" and everything in me wants to get there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2009
Mon, 01-19-2009 - 4:42pm

Having gone through this also after 13 years of marriage I can say that if you set the course and follow through that in the end it can be worth it.