my update
Find a Conversation
my update
| Sun, 08-31-2003 - 4:37pm |
Hi again everyone.Well it's been a couple of weeks since me and om ended our a, and I must say it was hard at first but things are much better now.I still work at the same place so of course I still see om but I'm just fine with that.We still talk and joke around but that's all.He still flirts but I just act like I don't realize what he's doing.I will not go there again,and I know he won't either.So we will remain friends.I have went to speak to a therapist which was really a good thing to do.He really helped me sort through my emotions.I go back next week.I have talked to my h about my feelings and he talked to me about his.He has really been trying and is doing a good job.He is not bi---ing about bills etc,and he is not being overly affectionate,which was driving me away.He told me that he loves me more today then yesterday and that will never change.He said I was his best friend and he does not want to lose me.I realized that I am so lucky to have a h like him.The grass isn't always greener on the other side and I'm so happy I realized that before it was to late.I don't want my m to end.I will keep working on my m.My feelings for h is getting stronger and I'm so glad.I want to be close to him.I will continue to talk to him how I feel and I think he will do the same.I hope I never go through this again.I know I still have alot of work to do but I'm confident that I will come out on top.This whole mess I got myself into really made me think about alot of things.I feel like a stronger person.I didn't tell h about the a though,and I don't think I will.He said we can overcome what ever problem we face but I don't want to take the chance because I know he will really be hurt.Is this the right choice?I wish all you people going through the same problems good luck.Oh,one more question I got om something for his new baby on the way(which is due anytime)should I give it to him?Hope this isn't to long.

You sound like you are coming out on top already,
good for you!
You are wise to keep the A a secret. I do not believe
there is any positive outcome possible from telling H,
and you are right, it will only hurt him deeply. I think
this is one area where total honesty in a R is not a
good thing, especially after the A is over and
undiscovered.
As for the baby gift, it sounds like a compassionate
idea, if MM will not misinterpret it. I would hope it is
not out of place with the other things he will get. Of
course, he will always remember that it came from you...
Good luck!
ditr
You didn't say anything about the gift,
and I was worried it might stand out in
some way. It sounds innocent enough though.
He may mis-interpret your gesture, but
you sound like you can easily set things
straight again.
Glad you're happy with where you're at and how things are turning out. Definitely do not tell H about the EMA... DitR is right: what good could it possibly do?
Give the gift. Actually, I think it seems more like a sign that you're accepting a new phase in both your lives. Hard to misinterpret a baby blanket and onesie unless you throw a garter in there or something... ;-)
Good luck with the work on your M. I hope all continues to go well for you.
-lily
It is hard to read other people sometimes,
some paranoia after an A I think is normal.
I would hold my head high and continue on
in as normal a fashion as possible, hoping to
outlive any rumor (if one exists at all). You
can't just come out to everyone and say it is
over, so you might as well live your life as
normally as possible and let them think they
were wrong. That is the funny thing about
rumors, you never know if they were true or
not. Live as if it were a lie, eventually it
will go away. Think through a denial, just in
case...
Hugs...