need a girls opinion!!!!!help
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need a girls opinion!!!!!help
| Mon, 08-18-2003 - 9:54am |
hi all let me explain my situation here... I am 21 and have been dating my boyfriend for 4 years and living with him for about 2 1/2, i have always been very happy with our relationship and i still am but.. a few yrs before i met him when i was about 15 (young!) i had this huge crush on this boy named bob we messed around but the next day things changed and he ended up dating another girl. So I just went on with my life and thought i wouldnt have to deal with him again. Well, a few months ago this boy comes back into my life,he is pretty good friends with my boyfriend and all of his friends now.
One night we all were drinking at his house and he showed me where the bathroom was and we ended up kissing with my bf in the other room. A few days later i kind of hinted that i may stop by and service him if he was home. (i dont know why i did all of this!!) Well he WAS home and we ended up taking it pretty far and we started to have sex but then he stopped and said that this was bad and i should go and he asked me if i understood, and he said we could never do this again. So i was pretty hurt by that but i assumed i would do the "guys want what they cant have" and pretend like i didnt notice him. Well then i got a job where he works by accident and i end up sitting right next to him all day. We have become pretty good friends.
Ok heres where it gets confusing, a few weeks later which would be saturday my bf was sick and stayed home while i hung out with his friends, i ended up sitting next to bob while we watched a movie, he started to touch my hand and we ended up holding hands the entire movie! Then when we went outside i asked if he wanted to go somewhere and he said no!!! whats that?? Then the next day we ended up alone again and he started to flirt with me on his bed so i kissed him but he didnt kiss me back! Im so absolutely confused as to what he is trying to do. At first i thought that he wouldnt want a relationship because of my bf so i figured i would just offer sex, but thats not working so maybe he wants a relationship! i have no idea!!!help please my head is going to explode i cant stop thinking about him. i still love my bf a lot just in case i didnt say that :)
One night we all were drinking at his house and he showed me where the bathroom was and we ended up kissing with my bf in the other room. A few days later i kind of hinted that i may stop by and service him if he was home. (i dont know why i did all of this!!) Well he WAS home and we ended up taking it pretty far and we started to have sex but then he stopped and said that this was bad and i should go and he asked me if i understood, and he said we could never do this again. So i was pretty hurt by that but i assumed i would do the "guys want what they cant have" and pretend like i didnt notice him. Well then i got a job where he works by accident and i end up sitting right next to him all day. We have become pretty good friends.
Ok heres where it gets confusing, a few weeks later which would be saturday my bf was sick and stayed home while i hung out with his friends, i ended up sitting next to bob while we watched a movie, he started to touch my hand and we ended up holding hands the entire movie! Then when we went outside i asked if he wanted to go somewhere and he said no!!! whats that?? Then the next day we ended up alone again and he started to flirt with me on his bed so i kissed him but he didnt kiss me back! Im so absolutely confused as to what he is trying to do. At first i thought that he wouldnt want a relationship because of my bf so i figured i would just offer sex, but thats not working so maybe he wants a relationship! i have no idea!!!help please my head is going to explode i cant stop thinking about him. i still love my bf a lot just in case i didnt say that :)

you are soooo young and obviously interested in exploring your options. i'm sure you love your BF, but if you're fishing with bob, you need to figure out where you want that path to lead. you say bob's in your social group so you're going to see him alot. and he keeps pushing you away, even though he obviously wants you. bob's actually trying to be the "good guy."
so my advice to you is think about what you want out of life and go for it. don't be afraid to accept change, if it's right for you and your life.
take care,
gurl