Need Insight...Long Story
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Need Insight...Long Story
| Mon, 09-15-2003 - 9:09am |
Well, new developements has caused me to wonder if maybe I should end my EMA. I saw my MM on Saturday and we spent about an hour together. When I got home, my H had arranged a sitter, made dinner reservations and laid out a sexy outfit for me to wear to dinner. There were candles lit throughout the house and he had already drawn me a bubble bath so I could get ready. We went to dinner and had a wonderful time..probably the best in years. He was like a different person. H appologised for the way he had been acting and treating me and asked if I could forgive him and we could just start over where we had left off, when things were good. I about died. Here I am dogging him on a daily basis and he is sorry, and wants to fix things. Well needless to say, we had a wonderful evening, night and AM.
Then I get up and go to work on Sun. And there is my MM. So I'm thinking...MM has said before that we really need to end things but has NEVER made any effort to stop. So Sun. he tells me that I am like cocaine and addictive, he is an addict and he needs to slowly start curbing his addiction before it kills him. The funny part is that I didn't trip out. I told him that I wasn't an addiciton that would kill him, and that I didn't think he could quit. Well all of this happened about a half hour before my shift ended. I didn't find him before I left and think I now have the resolve to end this.
You must understand...there is not an emotional(love) connection with me and my MM. It is just a wonderful friendship and sex(which is awesome by the way). Yes, maybe it is/was an addiction for me too.
Now what I really need from all of you is some advise/insight. Has anyone felt this way? I really think that my H will continue to be attentiveand I know that he loves me and I him. Should I do what I know in my heart should be done and end my EMA immediately, which I have to say after yesterday my MM has seemed to want to do too, or do I continue keeping both?
Any suggestions?
Then I get up and go to work on Sun. And there is my MM. So I'm thinking...MM has said before that we really need to end things but has NEVER made any effort to stop. So Sun. he tells me that I am like cocaine and addictive, he is an addict and he needs to slowly start curbing his addiction before it kills him. The funny part is that I didn't trip out. I told him that I wasn't an addiciton that would kill him, and that I didn't think he could quit. Well all of this happened about a half hour before my shift ended. I didn't find him before I left and think I now have the resolve to end this.
You must understand...there is not an emotional(love) connection with me and my MM. It is just a wonderful friendship and sex(which is awesome by the way). Yes, maybe it is/was an addiction for me too.
Now what I really need from all of you is some advise/insight. Has anyone felt this way? I really think that my H will continue to be attentiveand I know that he loves me and I him. Should I do what I know in my heart should be done and end my EMA immediately, which I have to say after yesterday my MM has seemed to want to do too, or do I continue keeping both?
Any suggestions?
Signatures On
| Mon, 09-15-2003 - 6:51pm |
I think you answered that one yourself. You said that you love your h and you don't love mm. You said that he's wanted to end it also. If you think you will be happy with h & he will show you the attention that you want and need, I'd dump mm in a heartbeat. You sound like you know what you want to do already. I hope your m works out for you. I hope your h finally will show you the attention you want and your m keeps improving. You know what to do, so go do it. Goodluck! Tell us how it goes. Later, Jdreamer
