New and in need of advice...
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 02-02-2004 - 3:25pm |
I'm new to this so please bear with me. After having typed 'need advice - having affair with older married man'..I've somehow found my way here.
Well here goes...
I'm 24 and I'm having an affair with a man whose 34 years older than me. Sounds pathetic doesn't it? (and I'm saying that as the woman involved). He's 58 and the absolute love of my life. We've been seeing each other for 4 years, we met when I was 21 and he was 57...I sometimes can't quite believe what I'm typing.
Of course as I say, he's married - his children are grown up - infact they're both older than me. But to be honest I don't really care. I love him and I know that he loves me. Why then you may ask have we not just said "stuff everyone, let's just be together?"...the reason being, we split briefly over something he done to me. What he done absolutely broke my trust - how ironic being as we're having an affair eh? But thats what he did. He's hurt me badly, but he's like an addiction that I can't kick. he knows my weak points and he does play on them. He's also pretty good looking for his age which was one of the reasons I noticed him to start with.
I can't trust him yet I love him more than anything in this world. He is my world. I sound like some pathetic silly school girl, but I assure you I'm not. I've got a very good education behind me and I'm very successul at what I do...so's he...we met through our mutual love of music and although I tried to resist him, I couldn't.
I enjoy being with him every second we're together which is very often. I don't feel the slightest remorse when I'm with him, I couldn't care less about anyone else - and that's wrong I know.
It's coming up to Valentines day and all that makes me want to do is stay in bed and pull the covers over my face until it passes.
I hate Valentines day because he won't/can't be with me and that's why I am feeling like this now, all empty and hurtful.
I just need a friendly, understanding reaction. I don't want or need condemnation.
Love to all.
Scarlet.

Mama
hi scarlettlady and welcome to our board!
back to you scarlett -- if MM has broken your trust that badly, you need to reevaluate the "why" of your professed love for him.
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board