hi attorneygal. welcome to the support board. it's pretty cool here. you'll get good advice and sometimes a slap-down, but usually nothing too harsh.
i'm in the legal field too -- legal assistant for a long, long time. i've worked with many different types of attorneys, male and female. for several years, i worked with a male partner and female associate (since then, she's been made a partner) who had an A and used me as the buffer/go-between. both were married and left their spouses, but there was too much jealously on her part because he had children and spent times with his W and the children. eventually they broke up and he divorced and she went back to her H and ended up having 3 children and is still with him. they both still work together and he carries a torch for her to this day. she is civil and professional with him
i left that firm, but am still in contact with many people there and it has been common knowledge around the firm, before, during and after the breakup. so be very careful, because even if you have "rules" in place, any two good-looking people spending time together will cause rumors to fly. and for goodness sake, no notes to each other for the secretaries and/or paralegals to find among the document production or notes taken in court. we did have some laughs with those visuals!
I can testify to this (no pun intended!). Sometimes you can be as careful as two people can be, but there's something between you. A spark, sexual chemistry in the air. Sometimes it shows in your eyes when you look at each other... Sometimes there's a familiarity between two people who have been together. I'll never forget, back in the early 90s, seeing the music video for "House of Love" with Amy Grant and Vince Gill. They were both married to other people at the time but there was a chemistry between them that you could just SEE. It's hard to explain... A lot of screen actors have it, but often once the sexual energy has been exhausted (in other words, they've SLEPT TOGETHER), the energy dissipates. So if you have been physical, it might not show, but the familiarity might be there. Some women just have a knack for seeing that between two people. My mom says she can tell. She said people who have been intimate invade each other's personal space more without even realizing it. So maybe if you're aware of it, you can work on not letting it show more, but be careful of going too far in the other direction. If you're deliberately keeping distance, it can arouse suspicions as well...
Glad you found us... it can really be a great support at a time of need. I know it certainly has for me.
It's good to see that you have some ground rules in place and that you both understand them... that's always a good start. Communication is always the key in a relationship... and probably more so in an affair.
If you are both content with what you have at present... then I'd just continue you to enjoy it while you can. Things may change in that you might want more and then might have to reconsider where you stand and what you want out of it... whether you want to remain second best will be a decision you will have to make.
I hope that you'll stay around and keep us up with whatever happens.
i'm in the legal field too -- legal assistant for a long, long time. i've worked with many different types of attorneys, male and female. for several years, i worked with a male partner and female associate (since then, she's been made a partner) who had an A and used me as the buffer/go-between. both were married and left their spouses, but there was too much jealously on her part because he had children and spent times with his W and the children. eventually they broke up and he divorced and she went back to her H and ended up having 3 children and is still with him. they both still work together and he carries a torch for her to this day. she is civil and professional with him
i left that firm, but am still in contact with many people there and it has been common knowledge around the firm, before, during and after the breakup. so be very careful, because even if you have "rules" in place, any two good-looking people spending time together will cause rumors to fly. and for goodness sake, no notes to each other for the secretaries and/or paralegals to find among the document production or notes taken in court. we did have some laughs with those visuals!
just be careful,
gurl
Glad you found us... it can really be a great support at a time of need. I know it certainly has for me.
It's good to see that you have some ground rules in place and that you both understand them... that's always a good start. Communication is always the key in a relationship... and probably more so in an affair.
If you are both content with what you have at present... then I'd just continue you to enjoy it while you can. Things may change in that you might want more and then might have to reconsider where you stand and what you want out of it... whether you want to remain second best will be a decision you will have to make.
I hope that you'll stay around and keep us up with whatever happens.
luv and hugs
Sweet
Sweet
Co-Community Leader My