It seems to me and (I can be wrong) that he's "doing him" & keeping his options open. He is after all a single man. I do believe he's being honest with you to a certain extent and feel when he sees his ex with a bottle of wine & he really wants to see her that it will lead to more then you would like for it to.
My AP is single as well and he tells me he doesn't see anyone but of course I don't fully believe that 100% but I deal with it. He's never showed me other wise and if he is, he's hiding it very well. Now if I knew about it, being the selfish, cake eater that I am I wouldn't be with him. Its either me or nothing (messed up I know). I told him that I don't mind him seeing other people in fact how can I blame him but would like to know since we have a physical relationship. I wouldn't be upset if he did...hurt yes but I'd be upset because he didn't tell me.
Go with your gut feeling, what is it telling you? Are you
Of course you're hurt and confused - that's normal. You've been intensely involved with him for awhile.
You shouldn't automatically assume that he's interested in being with his ex. Most likely they were just getting together to see each other again - have they remained friends? Maybe they both have the idea that something "could happen" when they reconnect but I doubt they both think they're "getting back together" or anything. Until there's something to tell, he probably didn't see the need to say anything!
He may say he doesn't want anything serious with anyone, but don't a lot of guys say that until they meet someone they get serious about? It doesn't seem to be something they "plan". So even if nothing happens with his ex, something may happen someday with someone else. It's something you might have to face sooner or later.
I'm also in a long term A with a single guy, and I always know that he could meet someone any time. I hope, for his sake, that he does. It's something I have to live with - knowing it will be over someday.
Proud to be a
You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull
Hi Soul,
Welcome to MAS!
It seems to me and (I can be wrong) that he's "doing him" & keeping his options open. He is after all a single man. I do believe he's being honest with you to a certain extent and feel when he sees his ex with a bottle of wine & he really wants to see her that it will lead to more then you would like for it to.
My AP is single as well and he tells me he doesn't see anyone but of course I don't fully believe that 100% but I deal with it. He's never showed me other wise and if he is, he's hiding it very well. Now if I knew about it, being the selfish, cake eater that I am I wouldn't be with him. Its either me or nothing (messed up I know). I told him that I don't mind him seeing other people in fact how can I blame him but would like to know since we have a physical relationship. I wouldn't be upset if he did...hurt yes but I'd be upset because he didn't tell me.
Go with your gut feeling, what is it telling you? Are you
Much peace & Love,
Rayne
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Thank you for your reply.
"I just wish he was honest with me, or respected me enough to tell me.
Of course you're hurt and confused - that's normal. You've been intensely involved with him for awhile.
You shouldn't automatically assume that he's interested in being with his ex. Most likely they were just getting together to see each other again - have they remained friends? Maybe they both have the idea that something "could happen" when they reconnect but I doubt they both think they're "getting back together" or anything. Until there's something to tell, he probably didn't see the need to say anything!
He may say he doesn't want anything serious with anyone, but don't a lot of guys say that until they meet someone they get serious about? It doesn't seem to be something they "plan". So even if nothing happens with his ex, something may happen someday with someone else. It's something you might have to face sooner or later.
I'm also in a long term A with a single guy, and I always know that he could meet someone any time. I hope, for his sake, that he does. It's something I have to live with - knowing it will be over someday.
You've got a lot of choices. If getting out of bed in the morning is a chore and you're not smiling on a regular basis, try another choice. ~Steven D. Woodhull
Proud to be a
You've
Yes they have remained friends.