New situation...seeking opinions

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
New situation...seeking opinions
3
Tue, 10-28-2003 - 5:45pm
I haven't started a new thread in awhile, but something strange happened yesterday that has prompted me to. Things between me and my OM are just 'ok'...we're keeping it casual and friendly with the occasional romp here and there. However a *new* situation has surfaced and I'm not quite sure what to make of it. I've been friends with this guy at the gym for a few years now. We flirt heavily both in person and occasionally online. We have both made very suggestive remarks to each other, never really thinking that anything would ever come of it. I am extremely sexually attracted to this man, and I have a pretty good idea that the feeling is mutual. I recently had a birthday, and we were joking around the other day and I told him that he "owed me a birthday spanking". He came back with "Sure...when do you want it?" Still joking, I said "how about Monday, since you don't work that day." Well...to my surprise, he actually showed up at my house yesterday. So here we are, the two of us, alone in my house with sexual tension so thick you could cut it with a knife. I tried to dance around and avoid the "spanking" thing, but he kept bringing it up. I have to admit that I was starting to get excited and aroused at the mere thought of him touching me. I kept thinking to myself "this is SO wrong!!!"...but it was like I couldn't control myself. We sat on the couch and he motioned me to lay across his lap. I was laughing the whole time because I was kind of embarassed by the whole situation. I then felt his hands on my bottom, gently caressing...I just felt this big knot in my stomach...I was so nervous. He starts to work my pants down until my bare bottom was exposed. He continued to caress, massage, and spank (LOL)...and I have to say that I was thoroughly enjoying it..maybe a little too much. He asked if I wanted more...I wasn't sure what he meant by "more"...more as in more spanking and caressing, or more as in take things a little further. Well...I suddenly started to panic and jumped up off of him and said "NO, that's good for now". Nothing else happened and he left shortly after that. Later that evening, I saw him online and we began to chat about what happened. What started out as an innocent conversation soon turned into a full-blown online sex session, with him telling me in explicit detail what he WANTED to do if I had said I wanted "more". I have to say..it was quite arousing and has definitely intrigued me to the point where I may want to pursue this...yet on the otherhand, I don't want to lose this person as my friend. I'm scared to death that if we became intimate, it would destroy our friendship...especially since I see him almost on a daily basis at the gym. Ladies...what do you think is going on here? What should I do? Should I jump into this knowing that it will never be nothing more than just a "friends who have sex" type of relationship? Can you REALLY be friends after sex?

Bfly

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-03-2003
Wed, 10-29-2003 - 10:03am
Well, are you really that good of friends? Sounds like it's just someone you know from the gym and if things didn't work out, you could always alter your workout to a time when you won't see him. I don't think in your case you should let friendship stand in the way of what you want if you're ready to do that with him. But inevitably it's up to you. I think you're going to have a hard time NOT taking it further with him, especially after your online sex chat...
Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Wed, 10-29-2003 - 10:18am
if you have laid accross his lap and let him spank your bare dupa you have already crossed the line between friends and......... something else. so you are having some fun. Go for it and quit worrying!

jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2003
Wed, 10-29-2003 - 5:48pm
Yeah, I guess we already did cross that line with the spanking, huh? LOL Well...here's a little update on the situation. As he was leaving the gym this morning, he told me that he was going home to iron his shirt for work. I jokingly replied, "Will you be ironing naked?" LOL He said "absolutely", and then he dared me to stop by and see for myself. Intrigued by his dare, I told him "ok, I'll see ya in a half-hour". I really didn't have any intention of going over there, but as I was in my car I had an uncontrollable urge to see if he was bluffing or not...so I drove to his house. I pulled in front and sat there for a few minutes to see if he would notice my car out there. A few seconds later, the front door opened and he was standing off to the side so I couldn't see anything but his head peeking out from the side of the door. He motioned me to come in...so I parked the car and got out. As I approached the door, it was clear to me that he wasn't bluffing! LOL He wasn't naked, but he was wearing a t-shirt and NOTHING else! OMG!!! Here I am standing in the living room of one of my closest friends and he's practically naked! I honestly can't say what was going through my head at that moment...I was embarassed, yet extremely aroused..and he could sense it. To make a long story short, we didn't have sex, but came pretty darn close...no thanks to my period. I don't know whether to be relieved or disappointed over that. When I got home, he called and we talked...I think he was feeling a little guilty. He kept saying that "we can't be doing this", and that he has "no control" to stop himself. I know it's SO wrong, yet I want it SO bad..does that make sense? I just know the next time we get together, we won't be able to stop ourselves from going further...which is exactly what I'm hoping for. I feel so out of control...is it normal to feel like this?

Bfly