Newbie.. glad to be here .. i think?!
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Newbie.. glad to be here .. i think?!
| Wed, 12-17-2003 - 8:58am |
Hello . . I have been reading this board for a little while now. I have been chatting with a man online and we seem to click... Hes not too far away from me, but far enuff that its not right around the corner. Hes married Im married.. We met briefly a few nites ago.. Just to say hello, put a face to the name..Now were planning on meeting again for lunch.. Im excited and hesitant.. Hesitant cause I dont want to get played.. I guess my question here is, how do you all know that your man is seeing you and only you?.. Lets face it men are dogs most of the time.. ??I know they tell you babe your the only one, but how do u know?? IS it trust? How do u trust this man when hes cheating on the wife?.. I really have given this afair thought and he and I get along great.. very compatable, just just dont want used and abused.. Any suggestions?? any one have/had these thoughts?.. thanks for listening.. Vix

In answer to your question about is he seeing someone else, I think you really have to get a feel for the man and if you believe him. Mine is very up front about that he loves his wife but there is no physical relationship there. He has children, evenings and weekends he is with his family doing things. Weekdays he talks to me online several times a day usually and we try to meet 1x a week. Mine also lives in another town. I do trust him though about not seeing another woman, he is a respectable businessman, and I know that the things we do together, he won't find with anyone else!! We have a spectacular sex life together!!
Once in a while we will ask the other if you think you would want to look for someone else? The answer is always "no".
p.s. and we've been together for over 2 years now.
However, you in fact *know* that your man is not seeing you and only you. He's married! Would it make him any less a dog if you were the "only one"? Would it make him any more a dog if you weren't?
Sexual jealousy is what has put our civilization in the position now of one in three people being "unfaithful". I don't understand this desire for exclusivity with someone that you know is already with someone else.
Why not just enjoy what you share with your MM and not worry about what he does with the rest of his time (assuming nobody's bringing diseases to the table)? How would that be used and abused? And by the way, what does he think about the fact that you're married? Is he worried that he's not the only one?
Edited 3/10/2004 5:04 pm ET ET by geek_chic
And finally, if you don't trust your ability to judge the situation, you can always check out a web site like www.snitchster.com. and see if his email addy or online nic have been posted there by someone else he was or is involved with. Considering you met each other online, this man is essentially a stranger to you and someone you know very little about (for certain). You owe it to yourself, for your own safety (both physical and emotional), to ask all the questions you need to, and to find out as much as possible about him before you take the relationship any further.