Newbie....with affair questions...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2010
Newbie....with affair questions...
30
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 1:02pm

I came across this site - thought I would ask questions

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-05-2008
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 4:34pm

I will always be honest with my AP if my husband and I were intimate recently

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2008
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 5:05pm

Well I never had the situation of same day come up before, I think it was 2 or 3 days between AP and H but never the same day.

Never at my or AP's house or marital bed, its off limits. To each their own, but I just think it would be a low blow to our spouses.

My H, surprising has never called. He has text me while I was walking in to meet AP, but it was not important so I told him I was walking into a meeting....not a total lie.lol If he called I would probably answer it to avoid suspicion but H probably wouldn't be suspicious if I missed a call, I miss calls all the time.

AP has never brought up size and well to be truthful their about both the same in that department.....lol

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2010
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 5:39pm
* Say you not planning on seeing your AP on a certain day...but really wanted to. Your husband decides he is "in the mood" before he leaves for work. Shortly after he leaves - AP calls - and he can see you after all! You guys get together...do you tell him about you and your husband being intimate earlier that day? <<<<>>>>
* I guess along the same lines...whats the closest time-wise that you have had sex with husband and AP. Exciting or not exciting? <<<<< N/A >>>>>
* We almost always get together at AP house...we have only had 1 close call in all these years. Are others o.k being in their "marital bed" with AP? <<<<< We choose not to know where each other live, this would never be an issue between us because each other's houses are off limits. That is just not something I could/would do. >>>>>
* We have been together...and her cell phone rings. Have others answered their cell while with AP to avoid suspicion and actually had a conversation with their spouse? <<<<< Yes, I have taken calls from H and had a conversation with him while with AP, he has done the same, it is a fact of life. I think in our situation things are a bit different as we are mostly just FWB mentality. >>>>>
* And lastly for the women...is there a noticeable "size" difference between AP and your husband. Does AP know? Does he ask? <<<<< N/A >>>>>
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 6:03pm

Well, once I actually had IC with my AP...I never slept with my H again. Before all that happened though, and I feel crappy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2008
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 7:07pm

me and AP have both had situations that we have IC w/ our spouses within 24 hours of being intimate. both of us try to avoid IC w/ our spouses within 24 hours of hour time together. sometimes its unavoidable and we both dont like it but it happens and you deal with it.


neither of us would go to each others bedroom for IC. i hate the idea of knowing "she" and him have IC anyway. same w/ him, he wouldnt go to my bedroom either.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
Sun, 08-22-2010 - 11:34pm

HI Steve


Nice to see another man here.


No I would never be intimate with both men on same day. I just think that is below disrespect. For the same reason I would never have my AP in my home, or enter his. There are other people who call that their home!


AP has answered calls from his spouse while Ive been in his car. It was therefore on speaker and uncomfortable for me. They are pretty cold with each other.


I never speak to my H with AP around. Mostly because we have a much nicer relationship than my AP and his W have. I dont want to make that obvious to him- wierd huh?


Iggy x

You are what you consistently do
You are what you consistently do
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2009
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 12:27am

Hi Steve - to answer your questions:


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-18-2008
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 7:26am

* Say you not planning on seeing your AP on a certain day...but really wanted to. Your husband decides he is "in the mood" before he leaves for work. Shortly after he leaves - AP calls - and he can see you after all! You guys get together...do you tell him about you and your husband being intimate earlier that day?

H and I have IC virtually every morning, so yes, it happens all the time. Sometimes AP's hint around wondering about it and I'm honest with them if they ask, otherwise I don't volunteer.

* I guess along the same lines...whats the closest time-wise that you have had sex with husband and AP. Exciting or not exciting?

Not sure, I don't carry a stop watch, but probably 3-4 hours (?). And yes if I'm fully honest it is exciting, being wanted by both.

* We almost always get together at AP house...we have only had 1 close call in all these years. Are others o.k being in their "marital bed" with AP?

AP's don't know where I live and I would not let them in my house. Just too dangerous since I have a step-D living with us. I do go to AP's house / bed sometimes, when the coast is clear. I think AP gets a kick out of it, me not so much but just go with the flow.

* We have been together...and her cell phone rings. Have others answered their cell while with AP to avoid suspicion and actually had a conversation with their spouse?

H and step-D call and I always pick up. Again to avoid suspicion since I don't work and its hard to come up with plausible excuses ('phone died' only works so many times, lol). Sometimes awkward if AP and I are in the moment, but again, this is life in A land.

* And lastly for the women...is there a noticeable "size" difference between AP and your husband. Does AP know? Does he ask?

H is unusually large so most AP don't measure up, not an issue for me. Some APs ask or hint around, j/k etc., and I always laugh it off.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2010
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 9:20am

1.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-22-2010
Mon, 08-23-2010 - 12:51pm

I'm just guessing...but I would think having the "bigger" guy after a smaller guy, would be less noticable than having something big - then small. Less chance the bigger guy would notice a difference maybe?

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