No I won't.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2004
No I won't.....
2
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 6:58pm
After my MM told me he was done he sort of later *tried* to take it back -

I have told you all I am not a game player - I tend to be the focused one in all of this - I compartmentalize well and usually don't show my emotions until usually I am pushed

up against a wall or I feel it necessary to show some -

My MM has tried to contact me several times - he deeply regrets his decision and wants us

to resume right where we left off ----

I on the other hand am not about to let someone put me thru this whirlwind of feelings and

thoughts about what I have done or not done to get to this point without a good reason from my MM - he just says "oh I guess I was having a moment" ...well that won't fly with me.

MM and I were to spend Saturday together - we had planned this for 2 months -

He had left me several messages telling me (not asking me) that he would be at this planned location and to meet him there.

I didn't -

He waited for me for several hours thinking I may have a change of heart and as hard as

it was for me to think of him waiting for me and him calling me several times nearly begging me to show up he finally realized I was serious

When confronted with a conversation I finally had with him last night he sort of

gave the impression his W was in his stuff and had found out some things but he later found out that she had figured it to be some other woman and when his W confronted this OW - this other W told MM's W that she was crazy...she basically laughed in MM's W face and said *SHE* would be the last person on this earth to have an interest in MM ---

later MM's W confronted someone else...

This is why I am glad I have no link to MM's W what-so-ever other than just knowing him

MM's W is going thru all of their friends one by one and trying to pick which one it is

that he is involved with -

I then am so annoyed he would jeopordize *MY* life by just wanting to resume where we left off without even a CLUE this is going on - it's just a matter of time before she either follows him right to me - or she hires someone to follow him -

For someone I thought was so intelligent and really in control of things he has lost his friggin mind -

He is now blaming me - saying oh now you are angry because my W knows...

Remember the post about what if MM's W found out and I said -- I sometimes think he wants her to find out --- well low and behold it happened and he could care less

He is now saying "This gives me my out -"

He says he can now leave free and clear because she's accusing him of something she has no proof of -

I keep telling him to keep believing that but until I feel comfortable he won't be seeing me anytime soon

I thought it was going to be hard and you know what --- it's even harder

He says things I want to believe but I have to protect my own life here

I feel selfish - I feel hurt and I feel confused -

I would love to welcome him back into my life with open arms but he is acting like a man I do not know -

Sorry this is so long I just wanted to post my update

K

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2004
Tue, 05-04-2004 - 7:16pm
Hi kikki! I am not familiar with all of your story, so I have a few questions pertaining to MM's W: 1 - Does MM know that his W is confronting all these people? It sounded like he didn't know, which I find strange. 2 - Does W know you at all? Is there a chance she will narrow it down to you?

I admire your strength and willpower in standing firm in your decisions and not going to meet MM on Saturday. That must have been very difficult for you to do. I wish you all the best, and hope that everything works out. Stay strong, and take care of you!

((hugs))

Circe

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2004
Wed, 05-05-2004 - 8:37am


(((((((Kikki)))))))))

I'm sorry it took so long for me to reply to this. I read it, but I've been swamped and you hit on so many different topics I knew it would take a while to compose a reply.

You're really going through the wringer, aren't you? First he says he's done, then he tries to take it back, his wife is on an OW stalk, you don't know what to believe, what's going to happen next or even what you'd like to happen next.

(((((hugs)))))))

I'm glad that you're not a game player. I don't know if I could have stayed away from MM for a date we've planned for two months. I would probably have shown up, just to talk. Of course, that would have led to other complications. It sounds like you're a pretty sharp lady.

What do you really want from the situation? I'm sorry, but I don't remember if you're married or not. But if MM was looking for a reason to leave, it sounds like he has it. I would be a little cautious, too. He's caught on the rollercoaster as much as you are, and I'm sure that part of the reason that he's coming across as unbalanced right now is that his emotions are. He's probably scared, frustrated, excited, worried, and confused.

Is there a connection that would bring W to your doorstep? I hope not, but at least if there is one, you have a little time to watch her in action and to prepare your response. If she knew, she would already be there, so I guess my response would be Deny, Deny, Deny.

Keep us posted and let us know what we can do to help.

And GOOD LUCK!



Cazrida