Not over afterall...

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Not over afterall...
16
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 2:58am
Hm, how many of you knew it wasn't over??

He came by and we talked for about an hour and a half. We cried and talked and hugged. He smoothed things over with the wife after he left here. He still Loves me, wants nothing to change, didn't mean what he had said this morning.

He knows he screwed up royally in the trust department with me. He's gonig to have to "earn" my trust in the "abondonment" department (his words). He just got wound up and didn't mean what he said, wasn't expecting the wife to say everything she said.

The fact is i don't want to end it right now, i *am* happy, so we're giving it another chance.

Thank you so much for all who posted to my sad post. i am still a bit sad because my trust was damaged. But i can understand saying something you don't mean in an emotional moment. i read and re-read all your posts becuase i know someday this will be over, i just hope it's isn't for a long time and that it isn't quite so abrupt.

Shortest breakup in the history of the world huh? He used the words hopelessly in love. Gotta give him credit for that LOL.

Thanks to all for understanding and being supportive,

jen

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 6:27am
jen ....i knew...you guys have made it out so far...you are probably stuck with each other :) although based on the religious reasons I was recently thinking about....the MMs with the single OWs and who don't intend to leave the primary Ws seem like a good bet for the Islamic concept of polygamy (serious thoughts....no pun intended...ok maybe little)where a guy can have more than one wife. No sin committed plus the offspring is all legal :)

Whatcha think?

PG

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 8:41am
Hi Jenny, glad to hear things are okay once again for you. We all wish you the best. Just remember though, your guy is going thru a tough time, there will be more bumps on the road. Just make sure you have good shocks!! Take care,

Dusty
xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 10:22am

whew, jenn, thank goodness MM came back, on his knees begging for you back!!

CL-Gurlfriend50

Co-CL of My Affair Support Board

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 11:23am
Philly, if you want to know the sick truth, MM and i HAVE thought a LITTLE bit about just having us all live together. My biggest hesitation is what other people will think. Perhaps we need a juicy post on why we let other people's perceptions influence our actions. it is actually something we are still "considering" a little as something to do way down the road, but i am not sure the chances are strong. Just something we talk about once in a great while. Thanks for your well wishes.

Thanks for everyone's well wishes, yeah, nice to know he's as in love as i am. He said he didn't think he "could" stop seeing me cuz he loves me so much. He definitely said all the right things.

Gurl, yes suffering will ensue, but i won't make it too bad. Nothing worse then what i was going through yesterday! MEN!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks ladies you are the best,

jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 11:38am
Jenn,

I know a friend whose realtive is right now doing this living with his wife and OW. None of them believe or follow Islam either. The wife lives one side of their house and the OW in another. I don't know the legal implications and such, but the OW and him are not married (even if they did it wouldn't be legal anyway). They all have share meals with the kids (I think the OW has one kid with him). I don't how they pull it all off but I was very surprised to know they all were happy too. I personally do not know if I would do it, yikes, but in some situations it does work.

Juliet

PS: I would be probably be sneaking off with the OM than the H and that would create more problems than anything I am sure. Not sure if my OM will even consider it. LOL


Edited 3/12/2004 11:47 am ET ET by julietsfate

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-03-2004
Fri, 03-12-2004 - 9:01pm


I _might_ be able to handle that type of relationship, but I guarandamtee that W wouldn't! (She doesn't even like him talking online...Of course, she has a point. That's how _we_ met! ROFL)

Actually, to Jenn, I'm happy for you. Enjoy the time you have with him and best of luck!

Cazrida

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2004
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 7:59pm
Hi Jenn,

Don't know you - haven't posted to you before, but had to say this. I find it ironic you find your trust damaged - please! All of us are violating trust by what we do. I know you are/were hurt but really, upset because your trust is broken or whatever??? Come on!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2003
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 8:10pm
hey cricket, since you don't know jenny for long, how come you know enough about her situation to say she shoudln't being saying anything about MM breaking her trust, hmmm??

BTW, are you jiminy cricket or the insect like as in the pest? :-)

Avatar for jennlynnk
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
Sun, 03-14-2004 - 8:31pm
juliet, thanks.

Cricket.. my MM have a relationship. Any relationship, especially one where feelings of love, and sex are involved, will have trust. Some relationships have a little trust and some have alot.

If i explained all the intricacies of MM's and my relationship, this would be the longest post ever. You will just have to believe me that trust is a huge issue for him and me, and this "argument" (for lack of a better word) is a pretty big hurdle to overcome.

If you are implying that trust between MM and his wife is broken or damaged you are correct. However, that is between my MM and his wife. That is their relationship, and this is mine.

i knew somenoe was going to "go there" when i posted this, but.. i am happy MM i were only "broken up" for 2 hours. i have never trusted any man as much as my MM and we are on our way to repairing the damage that was done.

~jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-12-2004
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 6:46am
Just offering food for thought is all. That isn't allowed??!!

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