note for kismet

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2004
note for kismet
2
Tue, 05-11-2004 - 2:36pm
Kismet,

Hope you don't think I'm too out of line here. I was just reading your other thread about passwords and saw your last post, and I had to ask you to clarify.

You mentioned that your H thinks your A is over but knows about it to some degree so he doesn't completely trust you. Then you mentioned your OM doesn't think you got back together with your H.

Am I right in drawing the conclusion that you are hiding the truth about each relationship from the other?

If this is the case... really, you need to consider taking a break from *both* and figuring out what you want and need. You stand a very good chance of losing both men if they ever found out the truth. It's just my opinion, but I would think you need at least one of these relationships to be established on a foundation of truth.

Yes, I have been having an A and have been dishonest with my W about it, and I'm not proud of that. But my OW knows everything about it, knew the situation with my W, knew where she stood and made her own decision to wait and see. If you want to have a future with either of these men, I think you should consider coming clean with one of them or ending it with one of them.

rain

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Tue, 05-11-2004 - 2:53pm
For whatever it's worth, I agree with you here Rain.

Take care

Red

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2003
Tue, 05-11-2004 - 3:14pm
Well first of all rain, I dont think your out of line, because what I came here for was advice and the truth and the way you feel is the way you, feel and I totally agree with everything that you said, but my H has no idea that im having an A, he told me today that he got a feeling that im talking to someone else, my OM just assumed from the last time that we never got back togetheir with H, and I know I should have told him the truth but I just didnt, and now today he's really pissing me off, because he told me he feels like im cheating on him because for the last month every single day ive been coming up with an excuse not to come and see him, and he thinks that I dont feel the same way that he does about me, but its not that, IM just getting really tired of creeping basically. I mean my husband calls me at least 10 times when im out the house, I guess I cant blame him though, Im just very confused and I know that I have to do something before things blow out of perportion like they did last year, not to mention my H and my OM works at the same place.