This one hit me out of the blue
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|Thu, 03-27-2003 - 1:23pm|
I just hung up with MM and he left me a bit puzzled. He offered to step into the background. Let me back up a little. My H and I went away for the weekend. We had a good time which we always do when we are away from everyday life. MM and I were discussing it and he made sure to point out that if I want space all I have to do is tell him. I asked him what provoked this and his response was that he wants me to be happy and if I think working on my M is going to make me happy then he will fade into the background, even though it would kill him to do so. Now, on the surface that is a very kind and caring statement, however, we have been involved in our relationship long enough for him to realize that one weekend of not fighting and having a good time every 6 months or so doesn't make up for what my M is lacking. I explained my thoughts to him again and he understood (he always does) that a break from him (MM) is not in my plans, and all is well with us.
Now, the part that has me puzzled is that in numerous posts in the past, MMs are the ones taking breaks and pulling back. I made sure to question him if a "break" was something he wanted. Definitely not was his response. We agreed from the beginnig that if something wasn't working for either of us that we would be honest and let the other know, NOT string them along. As far as I can see, neither of us has had our expectations change, nor has our relationship dwindled. So I don't know if I am over thinking his remarks or if I should be prepared for one of the dips that come on the rollercoaster.
I guess I am hoping that in getting this out maybe someone will be able to give me a different prospective.
Thanks for listening