One Year

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
One Year
2
Sun, 08-05-2012 - 3:21am

So this week marks our one year anniversary.  I'm not sure if he knows/realizes it.  I'm not even sure I'm going to bring it up.  I can't believe it's lasted for a year, I never would've thought it would.  It's been a roller coaster ride like most of you have gone through.  My whole life has changed this past year.  I'm not sure what is going to happen.  I love my husband to death but I'm just not happy and I wasn't happy before the A started.  Since I dropped the bomb on him about H and we picked this back up A has been so much better.  My AP has been more in tuned to what I need from him.  I on the other hand have stopped second guessing his motives and words and enjoyed what I've had.  I'm much more happier now.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-26-2010
Sun, 08-05-2012 - 9:27am
I am glad you are feeling more peace in your A! What kind of bomb did you drop on AP about your H? Not sure if I missed that in a post along the way.

You wrote "I love my husband to death but I'm just not happy and I wasn't happy before the A started." So what are you doing to find your happiness? What is going to make you happy? What are you missing? To be honest your statement is confusing. Do you really, really love your husband? Or do you care for him as a person, your marital partner and father of your children? Do you hold on because of your shared history and entwined lives? Did you start your A looking for a fairy tale? I know tough questions, but searching deep inside to the why's is the only way to find YOUR happiness.
~Sunny~
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
Sun, 08-05-2012 - 9:58pm
Those are good questions Sunny that I don't think I have the answers for. I just know that if I could combine both relationships I'd be very very happy. Yes I think when I started the A I was looking for a fairy tale and got swept up in it all.
AP and I had a fight back several months ago where he really pissed me off and I told him that H had known about the affair since NYE. Of course H doesn't know we started it back up, he thought it was over on V-day but it was a warning not to piss me off to the AP. It was a low blow to use it but I felt he had a right to know that H knew and could spill the beans anytime he wanted to.