Opinions

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2008
Opinions
48
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 3:27pm
Okay, there seems to be some criticism and negativity about affairs here...imagine that, on an AFFAIR SUPPORT BOARD, but whatever. What I would like to know is, which do you think is the lesser of two evils...two married people having an affair with no intention of leaving their spouses...just out for a good time playing around for as long as they can without getting caught, OR, two married people who are really in love with each other and would like to leave their spouses because they tired of the sneaking around and lying but are trying to figure out the right time and way to end their marriages? What is the difference between the two affairs? :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 4:02pm

>>>"Okay, there seems to be some criticism and negativity about affairs here...imagine that, on an AFFAIR SUPPORT BOARD"<<<

Funny you keep harping about this same issue but what you seem not to get is that SUPPORT comes in all shapes and sizes. You take what helps you and leave what don't.

>>>"What I would like to know is, which do you think is the lesser of two evils...two married people having an affair with no intention of leaving their spouses...just out for a good time playing around for as long as they can without getting caught, OR, two married people who are really in love"<<<

They're both the same. There's no such a thing as "lesser evil" when it comes to A-land. They both can hurt and devastate all including innocent bystander. People engaged in an A for different reasons. But I don't think you can thump your nose on those who's in it for "cake eating" reason because you think yours is more honorable. The right thing for us all in an A to do is to tie up loose ends in our M or R before getting into an illicit affair with someone else.



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"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


- Ramona L. Anderson
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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-17-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 4:44pm

Very good post, goddess.


I'm a lurker here and enjoy reading your posts.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 4:52pm

I'm a newbie. My personal opinion is that

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 5:22pm

Hi Gabby


It doesn't make sense to me that you would make a


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 5:42pm
Yes and in a perfect world thats how things would be handled before we get into illicit affairs, but then there would be no need for this board. And no I am not thumping my nose at anyone and their affair, just curious as to why you aren't so quick to make your negative comments to the people who are just having a good time having affairs just for the sake of having one.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2009
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 5:45pm
Thank you for your opinion...and I do agree with your statement about support. Well, said, thank you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-24-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 6:00pm
Well, I used the term lesser of two evils just as a saying...we all know that affairs are wrong. As one poster said, all affairs are different, different situations, which is true. I guess my point of this post was to find out WHY some posts about affairs seem to receive less support than others? Why is it that some posters criticized while others are not? We are all in affairs or have been in affairs and to make comments like you should tie up your problems in your marriage before starting an illicit affair are not support, they are out and out put downs for something someone is going through. I feel when you come to this board, there's a reason, either you are in an affair or were at one time, so don't point fingers or the term I like to use is be the pot calling the kettle black :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 7:36pm
Hence, the difference in our worlds. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I will say this again (I hope for the last time) what's support to me may not be to you and vise-versa. So, I won't split hairs with you even though there are a lot of stuff about your post to me I could knit-pick..... Alas, this is NOT the place for it. Therefore, I will disengaged and respectfully agree to disagree.


Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com
"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


- Ramona L. Anderson
Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 7:44pm

Thank you! Come out of lurkdom and share your story with us. Diversity is the spice of life..... And you're already on my good friend list.

;)



Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com
"People spend a lifetime searching for happiness; looking for peace. They chase idle dreams, addictions, religions, even other people, hoping to fill the emptiness that plagues them. The irony is the only place they ever needed to search was within."


- Ramona L. Anderson
Shadow Word generated at Pimp-My-Profile.com
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2007
In reply to: gabby4ever2
Thu, 01-08-2009 - 8:36pm




I don't really have much of an opinion on this either way, but I do have a pet peave


about affairs being called "illicit". The proper definition of "illicit" is "illegal".

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