Oprah

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Oprah
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Sat, 10-04-2008 - 2:39am

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sat, 10-04-2008 - 5:56am


After reading the view of the wives, well I was getting ready to eat a sandwhich, but am actually sick in my stomach now. I think about her, and all that she (W) has done for our "love child", and I just feel like the lowest scum of the earth. I have never viewed myself w/ such disgust, and repulsion. I mean I knew, but I just didn't think about it like that. I put myself in her shoes, and how devastated I would be if my MM cheated on me, and now I can't take those shoes off. I just can't un-ring the bell. All of a sudden I have been drenched in this wave of guilt that I just can't wipe off. I am so glad that I can't talk to AP right now. I know that I would end it, just as he prepares to leave her for me again.

I need some help BAD! I feel so awful I just can't stop crying. I have never really felt guilty before, and now I don't know what to do.

Once again Girls I need you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sat, 10-04-2008 - 8:02am

JUSTICE!!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sat, 10-04-2008 - 7:38pm



I posted the link as Oprah would say, an "Aha!" moment.....there was a new poster this past week that asked if men/women choose to have an affair due to having an emotional connection with another one person outside of their marriage. Most of the articles I read always say that men have A's for the sex and that women do it for the emotional support. I don't believe that men only have A's for the sex. In my
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2007
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sat, 10-04-2008 - 8:32pm
ditto, well said.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 1:20am

Oh obxbell, you know I love you right?! You hit the nail on the head w/ the emotion changing thing. I GET ON MY OWN NERVES! What you said is SO on the money.

Now I could be justifying things, but his W has said to him, before we were back together that she knew that he was still crazy about me (those were her words.) Now, if I knew my H had an A, and a child came from that union, and we went back together I would make sure that I didn't make the same mistakes that I made before. Like someone else said, their AP's W is very cold.There is NO sense of humor, no sex, no cooking. I mean what DO you do for your man, if not those things? My very wise mother once told me "You need to know how to do two things VERY well to keep a man, and cooking is the other one." PEARLS people, those were pearls that she gave me.

I guess that the nature of this business causes me to be so insecure, that and this is my first true love. The love of my life. Not just the love in my life, but the love of my ENTIRE life. I use to be very hard. That's why why I excel in the Law Enforcement field. I was often told by other male officers that I was really one of the boys. I would tell whomever I was w/ if you can't cope w/ the rules, I can have another to replace you before your side of the bed gets cold. Looking back I was a major b*tch. I wish that I could apologize to some of those guys who I hurt. You know I WAS the type that if you were in my life I made you feel like the only person in my life, but no can keep that up for long, so eventually they would fall as the others before them had, thus lots of broken hearts. For years I believe that that was why I was so devastated when AP went back to her. I thought that Karma had played it's role. I still think that's true, but I also think that you were right when you said that there is something bigger at work here.

Thank you obxbell. I was so upset. It was like it just hit me all of a sudden, but your words of wisdom broke through. Their marriage is over whether I'm here or not, he has said that multiple times. Thank you for pointing that out when I was quick to forget. You my friend are also a pearl.

Disclaimer: In no way was this message intended to generalize anyone, or the things that they need or want. Those were my beliefs, and desires. Thank you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-2007
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 1:32am

LOL Justice honey -


You rock!!

lightning in my heart

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 8:43am

I originally clicked on the post to see what it was about Oprah - I love Oprah - and I was about to click on the link and saw your post and was like, "oh, let's see what justice said about this" and then I was like "OMG!

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 11:25am
wow hit home....mm and i met at work...ugh..but then again..people with common interests are often attracted to one another....
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 11:41am

Aww Shucks, you're making me blush.....

Thank you tgr for your comments. It's nice to know that what I contribute on here is good. Sometimes in this crazy life that we have chosen I doubt myself SO much. It was nice to know that I am not the only wacko, no just kidding, but it is great to have this board, and to know I am not alone.

You know you say that you can almost see things as I process them. It's really funny that you say that because the right answers sometimes come to me, but rarely at the right time. I am famous for saying "You know it occurred to me later..." I will be so glad when things occur to me as they are happening, and then I won't have to keep going back, and straightening out messes that I have made.

Anyway, thank you tgr you're a doll!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
In reply to: californiadreamer2
Sun, 10-05-2008 - 1:11pm

Love the Obama support!

 

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