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| Thu, 01-15-2004 - 12:07am |
Hi everyone, just need some advice...I have a wonderful marriage and great kids. My H loves me and my trust in him and his fidelity is absolute. I have never cheated on him either. Our life is great except...since I hit 30 I have become obsessed w/the idea of cheating on him, just for sex...our sex life is OK but I am bored, am having a hard time dealing with the thought of never being w/anyone new for the rest of my life. But the worst part is that I am obsessed with someone else, someone who I see almost every day. It would be next impossible to break off contact w/this person (H's close family member). How do you get over someone when they are in your face all the time? For the record I think this person knows I think he is attractive but I don't think he realizes I am obsessed. How do you deal w/sexual urges, should I have an affair w/someone farther away from home? Should we go to marriage counselling? Do you think if we went to counselling that I would have to reveal my obsession to H in order for us the get anywhere? (i.e. will counselling work if I am hiding something)
Thanks in advance for your thoughts
Thanks in advance for your thoughts

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Let me tell you what worked for me and DH....
I've always had a hard time staying monogamous, since I was 16 and just dating. I've got a major wandering eye and it constantly got me in trouble. This is my second marriage, and in the first few years of our relationship I cheated quite a bit. A year or so after I'd stopped doing that, I came clean to him and told him everything, expecting to be divorced shortly. He just said, "Oh. Okay." Weird. In short, he's just not the jealous type (which drives me BATTY) and just trusts me.
Flash forward to three years after that...
I'm *really* glad you talked to him about this!!!!!
I understand it's a big ix-nay on openness or swinging...
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