Please help me
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| Wed, 09-17-2003 - 1:14am |
Here of late, he has not been as attentive as he has been. I know he loves me, you should see the way he looks at me. I can't describe the love and tenderness that is expressed in his eyes. If he did not have kids, he would have divorced his W by now and we would be together, but his children are very young. He feels guilty about "breaking up" their home. I can understand this as I am a mother and I went through the same feelings just before I filed for divorce.
Tbere have been some very difficult times for me here of late (professionally and with the kids, and ex) that have taken their toll on me. Well it just seems like the time that I need him the most, he is unavailable. He has not returned phone calls, says that he will call me "right back" and doesn't, doesn't call me on the weekends, etc.
I hate this. I hate feeling this way. I am usually a very reserved, self sufficient, strong person. In fact, I rarely cry, but these last few months, it seems as though that is all I do is cry. My head and heart are in such conflict.
Although I have had the opportunity to go out on "dates", I have refrained because I feel as though I would be cheating on MM. There is one man (MG) that is willing to fly me to visit him if I just give him the day and time, but I can't bring myself to have sex with someone other than MM. MG has no expectations other than a good time, I know this, there are not strings attached then there are other men locally that have asked me out and I have declined because my heart belongs to MM.
My MM and I have gone from talking hours every day to nine minutes every couple of days. He still tells me he loves me and has talked about our future together as reacently as today (during our five minute conversation).
What the hell is going on????? Should I be patient or cut my losses and move on??? I truly love him with my heart and soul, but how much more can I take? Of those of you who have been involved for years - how do you do it???
Please, please help me get through this!!!!
| Wed, 09-17-2003 - 9:25am |
