Queen of Ambivalence

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Queen of Ambivalence
3
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 11:28am
Hope everybody is doing well. I and H had a 6 day trip to San Antonio. He was attending a conference with his current company and me with my future company. This was our first trip in 12 years without the kids. My emotions ranged from not wanting to go without kids to getting excited to go to getting a major bout of cold feet and guilt to trying to cancel the plane tickets the night before but not getting refunded to actually flying to SA to feeling totally sad on the first day without the kids to schmoozing around with or ogling all the good looking fellas at the conference to missing kids to having a fantastic time with hubby to blasting him off from being not romantic enough to actually enjoying without the kids to fantastic boat rides to shopping to delicious food to walks along the River Walk to start missing kids again to warding off anybody else thoughts creeping in my mind to hugging H and shaking his head holding him by the chin and telling him I loved him to telling him I didn’t want him to finally coming back to kids and feeling happy that the trip was over and we were back into our real lives. Anyway, sometimes I feel that I am an alternate version of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I take the crown for the queen of ambivalence. I don’t know about you guys but I am slowly realizing that it’s me who is the problem and it’s getting difficult to trust myself.


PG

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 12:35pm
PG - Your post made me tired just reading it!
cl-noregretsyet (co-cl of MAS board)
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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 9:50pm
Thanks NRY. The post was in good fun with a little exaggeration factor attached to it. The trip was a blast. Anyway, summer is here...kids schools are closing...and I am about to graduate from the Academy of My Affair Support :) The lessons learnt are many but the most important one is that happiness lies within me and its I who has the power to make or break any R.

Rain, if you are reading this, thanks for your remarks regarding my opinion in another post.

NRY hope everything works out for you.

PG




iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2004
Wed, 05-19-2004 - 7:48am
"The lessons learnt are many but the most important one is that happiness lies within me and its I who has the power to make or break any R."

cl-noregretsyet (co-cl of MAS board)
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