Question-when is time right to end it?
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Question-when is time right to end it?
| Wed, 03-03-2004 - 9:11am |
I have a question for anyone who's in a mostly physical relationship with their MM (i.e. the "L" word has never been said nor implied).
I've been going along happily for a couple of years now, not feeling guilty, getting something from MM that H cannot provide me up to now. I don't really feel like I am "cheating" on H right now because I am getting something from MM that H has no interest in right now. I'm really only having sex with 1 man, its just not H.
But now it seems H may be ridding himself of the bad habits that have hindered our sex life for so long. Nothing's changed yet, but I just get this feeling that it may change and soon.
I know this may be jumping the gun, but for those of you out there, if H suddenly got interested again in sex, what would you do? Have sex with both of them and see how it goes or if it lasts with H? Or tell MM that you needed to concentrate on R with H now and give it a chance.
But then you risk losing MM if H goes back to how it was again and you're left with no one.
I'm not in this predicament yet, but I can see that it may happen sometime in the near future.
And I'm curious for any opinions/advice/words of wisdom.
I've been going along happily for a couple of years now, not feeling guilty, getting something from MM that H cannot provide me up to now. I don't really feel like I am "cheating" on H right now because I am getting something from MM that H has no interest in right now. I'm really only having sex with 1 man, its just not H.
But now it seems H may be ridding himself of the bad habits that have hindered our sex life for so long. Nothing's changed yet, but I just get this feeling that it may change and soon.
I know this may be jumping the gun, but for those of you out there, if H suddenly got interested again in sex, what would you do? Have sex with both of them and see how it goes or if it lasts with H? Or tell MM that you needed to concentrate on R with H now and give it a chance.
But then you risk losing MM if H goes back to how it was again and you're left with no one.
I'm not in this predicament yet, but I can see that it may happen sometime in the near future.
And I'm curious for any opinions/advice/words of wisdom.

hey dusty, email me would ya.
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
Hi Dusty,
This in fact has happened with me... MM and I started something purely physical... mainly because I just wasn't getting what I wanted from DH.
Sweet
Co-Community Leader My
And actually MM encourages me to try harder with H. He's always telling me why don't I try this and that. Then when I say to him "and what will happen with you if it works with H and we get our sex life back on track?" He doesn't have much to say then. I gues he doesn't really know what I would do at that point, maybe he would hope to still see me, but he does tell me alot that he only wishes me the best and hopes things can work out with me and H.
I really can't picture myself dropping MM, like you said, there are things about our relationship that I would still need, I really don't think H can give me, no matter how hard he tries. I think if anything it would be MM's decision to end it someday down the road.
Sometimes I say to MM, why doesn't he try harder with W, or get her some pills or something? He just says "ya right". It doesn't seem like there's alot of motivation there either or maybe he's just given up after so long. I think he's comfortable with things, and I think he would still want to see me even if I got more from H.
We did kind of talk about things like this before, and he said even if he gets sex at home, its nowhere as great as it is with me. Which is flattering, I think the same of him, its a hard act to follow!!