iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2012
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 3:35pm

Its taken me long enough to accept reality. He's not leaving his wife. I still get the discussions on how he "feels" regularily. That seems to be his motivation for the affair, His Feelings. He loves me. over and over again. However, he seems unmotivated to actually make any true step to be with me. I believe he is being trusthful about his feelings. I also believe that the A is the result of his wife distancing herself from him, although not wanting to end the relationship. I believ he wants to have a good relationship with her but can't. I told him yesterday that I am starting on-line dating again. He (of course) goes on abouty how he loves me. Its sad. Love is action? He is all feelings and no action. I am broken hearted.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2003
In reply to: Singlegirl123
Wed, 11-14-2012 - 9:11pm

Hi singlegirl,

I don't have any advice unfortunately, but I do know how you feel. I have been with my MM going into our sixth year now. He's not leaving his wife either, except that in his head it wouldn't be his wife that he'd be leaving, but he'd be giving up (and giving her) the house! Have you heard anything more ridiculous? There are no kids involved, they've all grown up and moved out. So, it's just a house keeping him from me. When I think about it, I feel the heartbreak too. I am luckier than most I think, as I do get 85% (at least) of his time. Holidays & birthdays included! I think it makes it worse, knowing that they don't love each other anymore..and haven't for a very long time. It is terribly sad. Oh yeah, I left my own marriage of almost 25 years because of my feelings.

Hang in thoughts are with you