Is This Really An Affair..What Happened?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2010
Is This Really An Affair..What Happened?
4
Sat, 02-06-2010 - 3:51pm

I developed a crush on someone I was working out with at the gym I go to.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2010
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 4:03am

talking and flirting and meeting to work out is not an affair.


you told him you have a crush on him and then you wrote him a note telling him how passionately you feel for him?


he does not want to "fall in love" nor lead you on and i think he might think that you are "falling" for him, and that is not what he wants.


he probably thinks he wants a fun, physical release with a mutual understanding that stuff will end as it needs to, or that if anything develops that it will be just a fun, casual thing, married guys like 'casual, once in a while' type things. although he also may not know what he wants and having you write this passionate note, well - that could be construed as a love letter, and no one in A land wants to hear that 4 letter word... soooo....


want to share what u wrote?

when one does not love too much, one does not love enough --blaise pascal
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-06-2010
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 7:27am

I don't remember exactly what the note said anymore...

Avatar for purp2010
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2010
Sun, 02-07-2010 - 11:25am
Well I would take that more as a love note than a naughty one.
Probably freaked him right out.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2007
Tue, 02-09-2010 - 9:01am
I agree he might have thought it expressed more feelings than he was willing to handle from you. Might have made him think, if you seem to "feel" for him now, with no physical R, then how would you react if there were a physical R? Next time you see him you might want to tell him that you were only trying to turn him on, you thought it would be "fun" to do so. The words you wrote DO express feelings, they are not just "turn on" words, you might want to think about that. IMO if you get physical with this guy you will multiply those feelings big time and it could be a complicated mess for everyone. Just try to keep that in mind.
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