Second time around

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2003
Second time around
3
Tue, 11-04-2003 - 2:22pm
I am in the process of starting a new affair with an old flame. We met 10 years ago and had an affair for 2 years, then I moved away and did not hear from him for over 6 years. We found each other on the internet and guess what he lives 10 minutes from me and works only 5 minutes from me.

I was truly in love with this guy and would have left my husband for him but we both had just added new additions to our family. Now we have gone to lunch a few times nothing else but I am not sure if it will not lead to something again. I know that I really want to but do I want to have the burden of an affair.

Avatar for mikkolover
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-24-2003
Wed, 11-05-2003 - 8:58am
this is a tough time, do some real soul searching. Is the time right or is timing just as excuse for not wanting to 'loose' everything you have with your families and spring into a new life together? lots of strength to you. I know that having been with an old flame, that even now i don't know what i'd do after years of no contact to suddenly be faced with him again. its a tough one. let us know how it goes..
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2003
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 10:17am
Things are proceeding but I don't know what I feel anymore. I remember what we had before and I want to believe it is still there. But then we have both aged and matured, are we the same people, will we like each other anymore. I am on a time table in regards to my situation. My marriage is doomed, my husband and I both agree that we need to stay together long enough to get our oldest out of school who is in her senior year. The OM is already divorced, has been for 6 years. I do not want to jump in a relationship w/him right off. The mixed signals I get from him though is driving me nuts
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2003
Thu, 11-06-2003 - 1:17pm
I guess you might have gotten your answer just by having to ask the question - don't you think? How do you feel when you've gone to lunch with him? Is there a spark? What is the relationship like between you and your H now? Are you willing to risk where you're at in your life? Only you can answer these questions - what do you think and how are you feeling? No bashing, no judgments, but think about what you do before you act.... he has to do the same.... you didn't mention if he is still M or not... Good luck to you whatever you decide. Let us know what happens!