Sexual Incompatibility
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Sexual Incompatibility
| Thu, 04-08-2004 - 9:39am |
Anyone on this board driven to their EMA because of a sexual incompatibility with H or W? Because of a connection you feel to MM or MW that you don't have with H or W? This would be emotional and physical.

So yes, we have a connection which transcends many levels - but a strong part of it is sexual.
Its kind of my fault, I knew it was he was this way before we got married. I guess I thought things would change after we got married. Also he is a really heavy drinker which does not help matters. And of course, nothing changed after the M.
Anyways, MM and I are very compatible as far as sex goes. We have been seeing each other 2-1/2 years now and it just gets better and better. He knows what I like better than anyone else has ever. And gives me exactly what I want. Its heavenly!!
Dusty
The OW is my exact sexual match. I honestly can't think of anything sexually I'd change about her, not one tiny thing. And this isn't new, this has been six months online/on the phone w/ 2 visits, then 6 months in the same ZIP code. Without sharing undue details let's just say that we have pretty intense sexual appetites and the buffet is always open...
Emotionally, the OW and I are also incredibly matched. I had gotten so used to having to modify my personality and everything else for my W I forgot how nice it is to be me and feel loved for it. Last night I watched a movie with her, pretzeled up on the couch. Two hours, we never broke contact. I really like that... the W would feel smothered. Our emotional maturity levels are the same, and we're just very, very good together. It would be almost impossible for the W to be as close without a new personality install.
rain
Edited 4/8/2004 10:23 am ET ET by opal_fire
GB2
My MM is my passion. The way he kisses me, holds me and makes me feel alive.
My H is a sweet man and he is gentle and kind. Sadly, he has no passion. He kisses like a wimp. He isn't the "man" in a relationship. How I have wished he would be. But he is the father of my two daughters and I can't seem to break up my family.
So my H and I aren't really sexually incompatible. We are emotionally incompatible. That yields a sex life of boredom and being unfullfilled. My H can't make me feel like my MM does.
I love these message boards. For 9 years I have felt alone. I have felt guilt. I have felt like I can't stay married and I have felt like I can't remain in my EMA. Yet in these posts, I have found wisdom, support and common feelings.
BUT, that's all we have.
I try to think of what else my H and I have in common, and I'm at a loss. We look cute together, we do have some fun hanging out and doing things, but we've never had a whole lot to talk about. Our relationship is very shallow.
With MM, things are very different. He, like H, has a strong sexual appetite. However, we have more than just sex. We understand each other, talk about our problems, we don't judge each other, etc.
Our sex, though, is very, very hot. I would say sex w/MM is the best I've ever had. I think it is because we have this physical AND emotional bond. When we have sex, we are constantly talking to each other, saying dirty things to each other, saying what we love about each other, what is turning each other on, etc.
So I guess I am a "no" to this question. Sex was good with H. But we had nothing else. Now I have the emotional and intellectual connection that I'd wished for, plus great sex!
Getting to the actual question, I think sexual incompatibility was a problem in my M, but not nearly as big as the emotional incompatibility. I think I could have lived with the difference in sex drive if the bond was there. Unfortunately, we had neither.