Sexy new AP...?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2011
Sexy new AP...?
6
Thu, 09-13-2012 - 1:50am

Officially over with Ex-AP. He did ask to see me and yes I did go...but before IC I told him we're getting too old for this. We were both tired and just chatting about life...the spark we used to have seemed diminished. Kind of sad. He volunteered an "I'm sorry about canceling on you last minute...I really have been getting bad headaches and need to get it checked. I have started worrying about it being a brain tumor or something...I really need to get checked". I kind of dismissed it and didn't talk further about it. Having had a few drinks I blurted out "Why are you like this?" He asked me what I meant and I said "We talk and connect like old friends but then you play all sorts of stupid mind games". He responded with "I am sorry. I have a problem being self-centered. You're right." IC was quick and I didn't stay. I got up and said I had to go. I think that's enough closure.

All of it made me sad. I was tipsy and decided to stop by another bar down the street before I leave. As I sat down I noticed a very handsome guy (totally my type) across the bar. He kept making eye contact. I had one more drink. He came over to ask me about the "interesting" drink I ordered. We talked and talked...he was really nice. I sort of told him my whole situation with AP. He was very insightful and non-judgemental. He walked me to my car and we kissed. We exchanged emails...I wrote him the next day and told him I was sorry and that clearly I'm confused etc. He said it was okay and if we wanted to be friends he'd be ok with it but that he'd love to see me again. The problem is...it was one kiss. One night. Yet I can't get this guy out of my head!

I should not do this again.......right MAS? RIGHT!?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2012
Thu, 09-13-2012 - 7:58am
Hey Blue, this post confirms that you were always addicted to the A rather than the AP. Now that you have established this what are you going to do about it? Keep using, knowing the possible and likely repercussions, or are you going to wean yourself off and get yourself to a happy and healthy place?
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2012
Thu, 09-13-2012 - 10:53am

In telling this new guy about your previous AP,  in my opinion all you did was make yourself look deseperate.  If it is an affair you are after and no emotional ties than go for it but I think considering your issues with your last A you really need to think before getting back into any relationship.  I agree with the other posters.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2011
Thu, 09-13-2012 - 11:18pm
Thanks guys. I know you're right. I know in my gut I need to stop this addiction. Also SireAnita....I HAVE thought about what happens when I lose my attractiveness with age...what then?

I'm not starting an A with this new guy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2010
Fri, 09-14-2012 - 10:52pm

Hmmm...that doesn't sound like blue!!!