Should I or shouldnt I

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Should I or shouldnt I
10
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 5:20pm
.


Edited 10/1/2004 6:44 pm ET ET by sally289
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2003
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 5:22pm
just mention it to him. see what he says. the only way to find out if he would like to do the same is to ask him. good luck.

*hugs*
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 5:30pm
deleted


Edited 3/10/2004 4:52 pm ET ET by geek_chic
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2003
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 6:28pm
Go for it.Good luck.All he can say is no that it proberly won't be possible to do.Hope you get what you want.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 6:52pm
Sal, I think you should plan it. Men do like for women to take control. Just tell him when to show up. He will probably love it! My MM loves it when I take the initiative.
Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 11:32pm
My one and only affair has ended after 12 years. I can tell you are I was like you once.....I thought spending the night with my MM would just be soooo romantic and awesome.

And it was.....everything I had ever thought about it being. My MM was the most kind, romantic, truly wonderful person as a lover and a friend. The first time over night was around our 2nd year together...

...now imagine the next 10 years......together for a 2 to 4 day weekend every month - we both had trusting spouses that allowed us to travel a lot. And we were still meeting at least once a week. We talked on the phone several times a day, we worked out at the same gym, we tanned at the same tanning bed, he brought me lunch for the past 3 years to my place of employment, we were on the computer the last 2 years every night.... he took me to Las Vegas for 5 days, and this year he bought me a beautiful diamond necklace for my Birthday (Just in October)

And then within a matter of weeks, his wife hired a PI, threatened him with divorce if he didn’t stop contacting me, she has all the evidence needed to see we were having an affair. He told me that I was the one he loved and wanted to be with...I was the one who held his heart, I was the one he wanted to live his life with...but he chooses his W yesterday. Doesn't matter why he did...he just did. And my heart is so broke right now...

My advice is never to spend the night with a MM....you will soon fall in love...

And my experience is they really do not leave their W no matter how old, how ugly, nor how hateful the W really is.

MM are mostly looking for validation that they are still attractive, searching to know if they still have it... Some are looking for love…like my MM…but even when he found love between himself and I, and he and I didn’t have any trouble accepting our love, for society it was unacceptable because the affair is a secret. What good is love if you can’t share it with the world???


But hey...who am I to say what anyone should or should not do...if you feel it is the right thing to do...then go for it...my ride was the best it could have been for the past 12 years. I will never regret those nights spent cuddled up against a person I love so much.

Take care and I wish you the best,

lillsilly

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Tue, 12-02-2003 - 11:52pm
I am glad you have no regrets, lillsilly. And, I am sorry that you are hurting now. I wish you the best of luck. You know, he may come back when the smoke clears.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-24-2003
Wed, 12-03-2003 - 12:18am

Hi Sal,


If you want to do it... just simply mention it to him and see what he has to say.

Sweet
Co-Community Leader My

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Wed, 12-03-2003 - 10:30am
Thanks all of you for your replies. I really appreciate it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-03-2003 - 12:01pm
hey sally -- a little late on posting to your question, but girl, just suggest it and see what your MM says. my MM made that suggestion for an overnight together, but after 2 years!

so just let your MM know you want to spend some quality time together and suggest the overnight. i hope he says "YES!!"

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Wed, 12-03-2003 - 3:17pm
.


Edited 10/1/2004 6:44 pm ET ET by sally289