I thought I could live without passion, too. And I was wrong, too. I can't live without intimate kisses and regular affection and attention. I don't know how all this will work out, but my d was filed by my h, who has all but refused to work on anything.... I just know I can't live like this. Everyone thinks I'm being selfish, and maybe I am, but I'm also SO unhappy in my marriage. When I came to the point that I'd rather be alone than be with my h, I knew I had to get out. The fact that I have a man waiting for me doesn't change my mind about needing to get out. And he and I have talked about our future extensively. It would be interesting for all of us in this situation to check back in 10 years and see who's still together.
seeking therapy will help you, regardless of the outcome, it will help you.
As for your parents, are you sure we aren't twins separated at birth? My mom would never cheat, but my dad had more affairs than I can count, he even lost a great job because of one with the bosses wife. I can't blame him too much, I'm so much like him and my h is so much like my mom. But, here they are, 47 years of wedded drudgery, and that is what it looks like most days. I'm sure they were happy at some point, and I know they almost divorced when they were right around the 15 year mark, but they went to mc and worked things out and are still together. Now, my dad judges me for my a and tells me I should work things out with my h for the kids and because of the vows.... ug, I can't make him happy, doesn't matter what I do.... How is it the "right thing" to stay together with someone you aren't happy with, who you can't get along with? What does this teach our children?
I do believe your children will forgive you.
Thank you so very much for your reply.
seeking therapy will help you, regardless of the outcome, it will help you.
As for your parents, are you sure we aren't twins separated at birth? My mom would never cheat, but my dad had more affairs than I can count, he even lost a great job because of one with the bosses wife. I can't blame him too much, I'm so much like him and my h is so much like my mom. But, here they are, 47 years of wedded drudgery, and that is what it looks like most days. I'm sure they were happy at some point, and I know they almost divorced when they were right around the 15 year mark, but they went to mc and worked things out and are still together. Now, my dad judges me for my a and tells me I should work things out with my h for the kids and because of the vows.... ug, I can't make him happy, doesn't matter what I do.... How is it the "right thing" to stay together with someone you aren't happy with, who you can't get along with? What does this teach our children?
Well, no contact lasted a whole day or so...LOL.
Ideally you tell your children that mom and dad BOTH love you very much, and you have done nothing to ever cause us trouble.
Thanks for sharing all that.