We are all only human... while I think that I've still got a few years to catch up to you... I'm not exactly young anymore and my children are just growing up around me ever so quick.
I have yet to walk away and start all over again... and I may never do that... but will if I have too.
Who says that momentary pause on the road, when we aren't sure which direction to take, is not allowable for strong people? Or that there is an age limit, or maturity level? Maybe I'm mistaken, but from your post it sounds to me that you've been at the steering wheel in a taxi and helping others along their way for some time (pay the bills, support SOs, raise children, volunteer, etc).
I'm glad you've remembered to keep your vehicle clean and shiny (keeping healthy, AND looking good too!) - you go gurl. But, have you remembered the maintenance schedule - the parts that we don't always see so it doesn't stay in mind? Get messy and check the oil and brake fluid - shoot, get the manual out and check the spark plugs or whatever! Sometimes we learn best when we do it ourselves.
Now it's time to turn in your taxi for a convertible, if only for a little while! Put the sunroof down, let the wind whip the cobwebs out of your head, pop in your favorite cd, toss the map in the back seat, and just go joy-riding for a while. Beep-beep - hey you're right beside me now, can you see me waving like a lunatic, lol, you're looking gloriously, silly happy - and still in control in the driver's seat!
OK, enough with the analogy (it's a fav previous posters used to share with me). It's ok - it's good - to be nonplussed sometimes - when one stops and wonders "what next" or "where am I going" or "will the real me please stand up", we are consciously living. What an opportunity to take stock and make decisions about our life, instead of each year drifting into the next! You might feel weak in the moment (though you really aren't) - you'll be even stronger for it.
If you aren't sure what will make you happy, do some soul searching - think of what you wanted to be when you were younger and "grew up", or what ideas you had to storm the world when you were 18, or when you were a parent with dependant babies what you would have enjoyed doing...did you have the chance to accomplish it all? Do your children or your BF or your MM have anything to do with those dreams? Is it possible to accomplish those dreams while maintaining your relationships?
It IS healthy to be left alone, whether you take time on your own for accomplishing goals, or for meditating and analyzing, or for just sitting in the bubblebath with a (small) box of decadent chocolates - everyone needs that time to theirselves to keep in touch with their own soul (that sounds cheesy, lol).
Remember while driving in your convertible, Gurl, that there are no landmines - though you may ocassionally hit a pothole. And worse-case scenario you'll blow a tire - we're here to help you change it.
I know EXACTLY how you feel, I'm there too. Sometimes I feel like I'm at a fork in the road and which way to go. It's good to update, refresh, take stock of your life and keep setting new goals, having new dreams, etc. It's good when you have someone you can share these with, but if not, don't get stagnant, be adventurous and go for it alone if you must. Otherwise you'll never know and always wonder what it would've been like.
Sometimes feeling uneasy is good, because it's telling you that a change is in order and you have a choice to make, to make changes, or to stay where you're at.
Remember, life is short ... don't wait too long, change is good, it causes one to grow.
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Hey Gurl,
We are all only human... while I think that I've still got a few years to catch up to you... I'm not exactly young anymore and my children are just growing up around me ever so quick.
I have yet to walk away and start all over again... and I may never do that... but will if I have too.
Sweet
Co-Community Leader My
Who says that momentary pause on the road, when we aren't sure which direction to take, is not allowable for strong people? Or that there is an age limit, or maturity level? Maybe I'm mistaken, but from your post it sounds to me that you've been at the steering wheel in a taxi and helping others along their way for some time (pay the bills, support SOs, raise children, volunteer, etc).
I'm glad you've remembered to keep your vehicle clean and shiny (keeping healthy, AND looking good too!) - you go gurl. But, have you remembered the maintenance schedule - the parts that we don't always see so it doesn't stay in mind? Get messy and check the oil and brake fluid - shoot, get the manual out and check the spark plugs or whatever! Sometimes we learn best when we do it ourselves.
Now it's time to turn in your taxi for a convertible, if only for a little while! Put the sunroof down, let the wind whip the cobwebs out of your head, pop in your favorite cd, toss the map in the back seat, and just go joy-riding for a while. Beep-beep - hey you're right beside me now, can you see me waving like a lunatic, lol, you're looking gloriously, silly happy - and still in control in the driver's seat!
OK, enough with the analogy (it's a fav previous posters used to share with me). It's ok - it's good - to be nonplussed sometimes - when one stops and wonders "what next" or "where am I going" or "will the real me please stand up", we are consciously living. What an opportunity to take stock and make decisions about our life, instead of each year drifting into the next! You might feel weak in the moment (though you really aren't) - you'll be even stronger for it.
If you aren't sure what will make you happy, do some soul searching - think of what you wanted to be when you were younger and "grew up", or what ideas you had to storm the world when you were 18, or when you were a parent with dependant babies what you would have enjoyed doing...did you have the chance to accomplish it all? Do your children or your BF or your MM have anything to do with those dreams? Is it possible to accomplish those dreams while maintaining your relationships?
It IS healthy to be left alone, whether you take time on your own for accomplishing goals, or for meditating and analyzing, or for just sitting in the bubblebath with a (small) box of decadent chocolates - everyone needs that time to theirselves to keep in touch with their own soul (that sounds cheesy, lol).
Remember while driving in your convertible, Gurl, that there are no landmines - though you may ocassionally hit a pothole. And worse-case scenario you'll blow a tire - we're here to help you change it.
Meow
hi cowboy and thanks for the pep talk!
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
oh meow, let's go on a roadtrip in the convertible!!!
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
I know EXACTLY how you feel, I'm there too. Sometimes I feel like I'm at a fork in the road and which way to go. It's good to update, refresh, take stock of your life and keep setting new goals, having new dreams, etc. It's good when you have someone you can share these with, but if not, don't get stagnant, be adventurous and go for it alone if you must. Otherwise you'll never know and always wonder what it would've been like.
Sometimes feeling uneasy is good, because it's telling you that a change is in order and you have a choice to make, to make changes, or to stay where you're at.
Remember, life is short ... don't wait too long, change is good, it causes one to grow.
In the meantime, we're here for you.
Hugs
Luvin
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
Hang in there.
Charlotte
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