this is some real talk right here

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
this is some real talk right here
9
Wed, 10-08-2008 - 8:32pm

has anyone here ever done or said anything to their AP, that was so "OF DA HOOK" that he or she should have "whooped yo azz"? not literally whooped yo azz, but figuratively whooped yo azz.

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2006
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 1:01am

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 10:58am

Wow our situations are very similar. I am S w/ a MM, who is 14 yrs my senior. He too is very wise, and I have learned so much from him. This is my first true love, and it's been a rough ride. I learn something new about feelings and how to react to them it seems like everyday.

AP and I met at work. We are both in law enforcement. One day we were in roll call. Everyone knew that we were together despite the fact that both of us were M. We never tried to hide it, looking back I am not so sure that was wise.

Anyway, we were in roll call, but it was over and all the officers were still in there for a few minutes before hitting the bricks. We had already been arguing that day, and he made a smart a** remark, I can't remember now what he said, but he REALLY embarrassed me. Well, he made the mistake of turn his back to me when I tried to address what he said. I was LIVID! I smacked him in the back of the head SO hard that it knocked him out of his chair, and onto the floor. Now my AP is a big guy, so it really took a hard hit to knock him down. He was sitting on the floor w/ his jaw sitting next to him w/ the rest of the jaws of the other officers. I knew as soon as he hit the floor that I was in trouble. I thought "Oh my God, that's it, I am going to get fired and dumped all in the same day." I just left the roll call room, and went about my business.

Later of course I apologized profusely, but at the same time I told him that he was way out of line. My reaction was inappropriate, but so was the remark that he made. He was joking around and said "Yeah that one was for free, the next one will cost you!" But I know he's full of crap, he would never hit ANY woman, especially me.

That was a great question! I had forgotten about that day, it was about 7 yrs. ago. I am sure AP, and the other officers still remember. They always tease him, and say sh*t like "Don't make me go get her, cause you know she's gonna whip yo a** AGAIN!" I am glad it's funny now, because it wasn't then.

Thanks for a great question!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 11:11am
girl..i know what you mean..wow....yes, and it's our emotions controlling our reactions to situations that hurt us with them....been there...(not the "BIG O" thing because uhhh well..i never have to fake it with him)
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 11:18am
girl, i "F'd" my AP up, so i thought..one night..i was stankin' azzed drunk...it was right after we were on yet another expedition for 3 days (not our vacation but an extended overnight..again..i'se spoiled) well wifee..text him...and he opened it up and i saw it...he claimed he didn't recognize it was her because she never texts him and that's our thing ( i even taught him how to use the text messaging on his phone when we first started hanging out and road dogs) he said his wifee never texts him and he didn't know she knew how to use it..well...come to find out the daughter was with the mom eggin' her on telling her "dad uses texts all the time, i'll show you how to use it, text dad something" and showed her....her and daughter were on vacation, he doesn't go with them...so we had yet another extended ON session.....anyhow..my little heart was so very hurt...but we eventually made up...he found a reason to justify that...but there really is no justification...i was wayyy out of line,,,i even scratched up his neck...i didn't mean to and felt so bad...but he had once told me that if i ever hit him he probably deserved it...i guess that was his guilt on his mind one time....don't know...but, he is still very wise....i have some serious Mistress Meltdowns, gotta learn to feel all the emotions good and bad but, control my reactions to them...i'm working on it and i hope that he just doesn't give up on me....i really am learning so much about relationships and interactions romantically from him.....
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2004
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 3:50pm
oh my goodness, I'm have been with my AP for 5 1/2 yrs and let me tell you... l am very opionated and don't mind saying anything that's on my mind (usually without thinking first), he is the complete opposite. I have done and said things through the years that still makes me wonder why he even bothers with me... I'm 0super selfish, but he is too,
Woman Rain Pictures, Images and Photos
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2008
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 3:54pm
okay it is a crazy life and i thank all of you for responding because...i posted like that for support..i thought i was the only one that turned to nutcase mode after this A....lol...glad to know i'm not alone..support is a good thing.....wow..but i've really got to learn to control the reaction of my emotions
"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

"be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"---Dr. Seuss

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-05-2004
Thu, 10-09-2008 - 3:59pm
Well trust me, your not alone, and this type of realationship will drive you MAD!!!! hee hee
rain
Woman Rain Pictures, Images and Photos
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 1:40am
Oh no Honey, you are not alone! I visit Psychoville often, as a matter of fact I have a condo there! LMAO!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2008
Fri, 10-10-2008 - 7:33pm

Great timing on this question.