Starting to want out

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Starting to want out
10
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:06pm
I have been a little under the weather for the past week and as a result called out one time this week from work well MM and a dear male friend of mine who knows of the A (MM doesnt know about that he knows) work where I work. Well MM was very concerned at our meetings before starting work and splitting to our departments and was telling me to talk to my boss about going light duty that day or just going home. Mind you while I was out he hadnt called me at all as he usually does when he is off so he did not know I got sick. My male friend, who works closely with MM, was concerned also. MM waited a little after the meeting while I talked to my boss but left right before I was finished, so he didnt wait. He called just once at the beginning of the shift to see if I was feeling ok. I said that they placed me on light duty and he just replied ok. Nothing after that, am sitting here thinking he either doesnt give a hoot or just doesnt want to call. Well after work, 8 hours later, he asked me how I was feeling and I just said better. Just at that moment my male friend (MF) called but I didnt answer and MM told me that MF had told him that what kind of friend he was not to call me all night to ask how I was, and MM told me that he didnt call because he didnt want to bother me, then he acted all concerned telling me to take it easy and he waited there until I left. THen I called MF and he told me that he didnt like the way that MM treated me that it was in his interest, since he "loves me so much" to check out how I was and he told me that he told MM "sometimes I think I care more about her than you do, and you have known her longer". Also MF told me that he got mad because for the second time MM asks him if he would sleep with me and if he likes me, and MF answers we are good friends, no. MM asked these questions to MF right before I saw him this morning (we work nights so that was the end of the shift) Well again I have not heard from MM, not even a how are you doing after all the "concerne" this morning. But I did her from MF, go figure. I feel like crap and feel MF does care more than MM. I wish it was MM. sorry so long

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:27pm
sally - i'm sorry you're not feeling well. and on top of that, having to deal with MM's insensitivity gets to be too much, doesn't it?! and just to top off the whole pile, MF is jumping in to your defense with both feet! whew, girl!

it sounds like your MM doesn't think about you unless you are in front of him. does he do this often, ignore you and your feelings? why is MM being so dense? and hot and cold??

if it were me, i'd back off from the whole situation, MM and MF, and get myself well and get involved in the holidays/family/gifting activities that abound this time of year. be nice to MF, but don't confide in him anymore about MM because he IS jealous of MM and is interested in you, just isn't pushing his cause because you are obviously hung up on MM. and MM, well, he's just being an insensitive mutant of a guy! not even a phone call to see how you're feeling. that's a little too little in the care department, girl.

rest, make yourself better. take care of yourself!

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:38pm
deleted


Edited 3/10/2004 4:59 pm ET ET by geek_chic
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:41pm
Thank you gurl you are right, he does not seem to care at all. Sometimes I need someone else to slap me into reality. Worst thing is we are supposed to have our first all nighter next week, and this just took all of the umph out of it, and I dont think I want to do it anymore. Either that, or do it and then break it off right before leaving. To get a last...well you know.

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 4:46pm
Thank you geek. I was thinking the same thing you were because last night at work he could have text me to see if I wanted anything like MF usually does but he didnt, oh well feeling like crap but opening up my eyes just a little bit more. As for MF I think MM is kind of jealous of our friendship. But jeez he pays more attention to me than he does!

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:23pm
What I was kind of implying was that maybe MF is better for you than MM, and so to hell with him if he *is* jealous-- that's his problem!

Where on earth does a MM get off being jealous anyway?! Hello, the pot just called the kettle black! That would be like me getting pi$$y if SG went out and got himself a honey! I'd be happy for him, is what I'd be, but that's compersion for ya. :-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:32pm
Worst thing is he asks MF if he is interested in me and then doesnt care if I am feeling better or not. About MF I dont like him in that way at all. He is a great friend though, but unforunately I do think that he is interested in me. I dont know what to do about MM I want to break it off so bad and tell him how insensitive he has been but on the other hand I am dying to have that all nighter with him next week and then end things.

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:38pm
deleted


Edited 3/10/2004 4:59 pm ET ET by geek_chic
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:47pm
deleted


Edited 3/10/2004 4:59 pm ET ET by geek_chic
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:50pm
Good idea geek that is what I will do. As far as him being insensitive I really dont know because he acts like he cares when he is right in front of me and tells me that the reason that he does not text me is because he doesnt want to bother me and that he knows how it feels to feel bad and not want to be bothered. Then again I think still wouldnt you want to know how the person is. I know we will see each other tonight so I dont know if that is the reason for him not calling again him not wanting to bother me, so he says. Thing is I told him this morning that he did alright in not contacting me, because I didnt want him to think that the phone was attached to my hip waiting for his text which in reality I wasnt but still would have been nice. All in all he has always been a no call kind of guy but sometimes he has his moments when he does and is very sensitive, but that is rare. He says he cares and loves me very much, but that is kind of hard to believe. Thank you again geek.

Sally

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 5:53pm
"Mustang Sally" heh, gotta hear that one. Thanks geek chic. ;)