Talk about the future-Exciting & Scary
Find a Conversation
Talk about the future-Exciting & Scary
| Tue, 04-27-2004 - 11:38am |
Last night at dinner, my OM and I were planning out the future together...where we will live, what cars we should buy to haul around all those future children,etc. Very exciting stuff but scary too!
Anyone else have these discussions and can't believe they are happening? Keep in mind, out of a 3 year relationship, in a matter of 2 months we have gone from not speaking of feelings to talking about spending our lives togehter.
Anyone else have these "hard to believe" moments? How do they make you feel?

P and I do not talk about that sort of thing. In fact, he never even mentions leaving his wife for me. However, he does talk about how he will probably never marry again. He talks about that like he knows splitting with his wife is inevitable. He knows that I also do not want to be married ever again, after going through the disatrous marriage that I had. If P did talk about that sort of thing, it would probably freak me out. Don't get me wrong, I'm crazy about him, and if this thing between us ended tomorrow, I would be crushed. But I'm not ready to talk about all that. He is a father, first, before anything else, and I respect that. I always know that I come third...after family and his job. He comes third to me also, after family and job too. So, while I can understand your excitement and anxiousness about this, I have no idea, firsthand, what that feels like. I would probably have a panic attack!
Bottom line (I'm big on bottom lines)- I'm happy for you. I'm happy that y'all feel comfortable discussing that. It's an encouragement to me, definitely.
LM227
Yes, every morning for the past three weeks. I moved out on a Sunday afternoon and have spent every night with my OW since then.
Every morning I wake up it seems that however we've slept, she still has managed to work her way under my arm to drape that little form half over me...
We don't have lots of future talks yet. We did that for a while last summer, then things delayed, and now I think both of us are just happy to be making the progress we are.
There are a few incidents where one of us will mention something vague about the future -- the other day I said I was going to give up my 2+2 sports car in 2 years and buy a small or medium SUV since the munchkin will be starting to cramp up back there. I said it just off handed and casually and I thought she was going to rip my arm off she hugged it so hard. I guess the casual thoughts are easier to swallow than the Big Grand Plans, which seem to have a way of going astray.
rain
But back to the point, we often hit those moments in conversation when my heart will skip a beat. Probably the greatest for me was when IS said, "I never wanted to have children until I met you. Now I can't wait."
i dont need to go into the rest of the story - but it gave me a boost. His Dad isn't around so MM is all he has. I know - thats really scary considering the situation but....It just happened that way