Things Are Getting Out of Control

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2008
Things Are Getting Out of Control
20
Thu, 09-18-2008 - 6:07pm

Okay so I have mentioned that I fooled around with my best-friends husband ONCE and things are getting really sticky... She is telling me that things are getting worse between them and she is telling me that they have not been intimate in months...So, she is really worried... and asking me what she should do...


We all had dinner last night and he and I ended up alone like always and it wasn't so awkward until he told me he loved me and wanted to leave his wife...he said that he has given it some thought and wants a divorce and he is willing to wait for some time to go by before we try to see if us works...he said the he knows

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Sat, 09-20-2008 - 5:32am
I was just curious, did the kiss and other activity happen before they were together or after the were together? Even if it was after they were together it was a kiss, and a grab. It's not like you slept w/ him right? As I am sure you know cheating w/ you b/f's H is right up there w/ cheating w/ mom's b/f, or sister's b/f. At no time should that line be crossed, but you did. Thank God you had the sense to not let it go any further. I would bluff him, and tell him that you are going to tell her yourself if he doesn't chill,or you could tell him that your going to tell her you saw him kissing some woman you didn't know. Of course he will try to out you, but her lack of trust after what she has learned will make her more likely to believe you. Whatever you do, do don't tell her it was you, even if one day you two aren't b/f anymore. I don't know if that was any help, but think about it, because if keeps this behavior up, someone will over hear you arguing one day, she will catch you telling him off, and demand to know what is going on. Good Luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2008
Wed, 09-24-2008 - 6:21pm

I feel like I am being loud... I have told him that it will never happen again... I told him what he feels does not matter because I will never cross that boundary again... I don't hug him other then to say hi when I get to a place or when he gets to a place he hugs me... Our converstations are very short and in front of everyone so nothing is said... I have tried to get away from him and I avoid trips anywhere so no one says why don't you both go to the store...


I don't let him do anything to me...cause like I said we were close and he use to message me...play with my hair...we even use to cuddle... but now I stay far far away....


I don't know how else to tell him NO....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2008
Wed, 09-24-2008 - 6:30pm

Thats the thing he is being really smart and waiting until we are completely alone... or he calls me and tells me that stuff... I just feel like its getting worse before it gets better... I told him I would tell her he said fine then maybe she will see that her and I are over and have been for years... I mean its not like he wants to marry me, but he said you know I have always had feelings for you, but because of the way things happened I married her and now more than ever I realize that I did love her, but she was never the one for me... I told him I don't care who the one for

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2007
Wed, 09-24-2008 - 7:42pm

YOU RUN THE OTHER WAY AS QUICKLY AS YOU CAN!!!!!!! Take it form someone who has BTDT. It is not worth the friendship or the pain of getting caught and losing it all.

Lost~



iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Wed, 09-24-2008 - 9:24pm

Well said!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2008
Mon, 10-20-2008 - 1:15pm
I was in a somewhat similar situation.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2007
Mon, 10-20-2008 - 8:20pm

I totally agree with changeisneeded2008 he's going to tell her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Tue, 10-21-2008 - 3:15am
I was just curious, what does BTDT mean?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2008
Tue, 10-21-2008 - 5:00am

BTDT means 'been there, done that':)

pisces
pisces
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-06-2008
Wed, 10-22-2008 - 1:15am

Oh ok, that makes sense.

I don't know if you saw the post that I put up where I apologized for my behavior w/ the troll, but I am sorry. Thanks for warning me about TOS violations. I got two separate warnings that I had violated the TOS agreement. So does that count as two separate episodes, and I only have one chance left, or is it counted as 1 occurrence, and I have two left? Either way I certainly don't plan on disrespecting anyone else. I was just curious. Thanks again.

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