Thoughts?Off-topic
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Thoughts?Off-topic
| Tue, 07-14-2009 - 2:02pm |
Now,my AP is a MM and i am SW,pretty much happy with the way things are.Yday my AP was being very nostalgic,hmm.Well, he shared with me how he and his W met ,started dating and stuff.What struck me was that he and his W had lots of things in common when they started together.They adored doing the same things and shared the same philosophy of life.My AP says he was surprised how some one else could be sooo similar to him! He started with the belief that they will stay together as they have a lot ( or almost everything )in common ,will always do things together( as both liked the same things)and hence,stay forever together.
But after few years of M,they are apart?? Isnt having everything in common,liking the same things,doing everything together,not what we all look for?
Guess, what i am asking is,is not all this enough to make a M last?its a bit off-topic but would love some insite.
thanks.
But after few years of M,they are apart?? Isnt having everything in common,liking the same things,doing everything together,not what we all look for?
Guess, what i am asking is,is not all this enough to make a M last?its a bit off-topic but would love some insite.
thanks.

Most men who have an A does not mean they're ready to leave their M or that they don't love their W anymore. Sometimes they just do it because they think they can. But the minute they're found out, it's the OW who'll usually get introduce to the underside of the bus.
The problems is that the OW will fall for the lies, gets emotional and end up hurt. My caution to all contemplating engaging in an A with a MM would be. Know that you're just an option (not the priority). Keep your expectations low, avoid falling in love with the MM and just enjoy the moment you have together. If you can't follow these simple rule then you're better off not getting involve with them until they're free and available to pursue an honest R with you.
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Goddess is right. You asked "Guess, what i am asking is, is not all this enough to make a M last?" Isn't your MM's marriage still lasting? Is he out the door yet?
Also, there is a misconception that doing EVERYTHING together makes a marriage last. I don't agree with that. I think the couple should have many interests together so that they will always enjoy their time together doing those things. It won't work if one of them "pretends" to like something but isn't really enjoying doing it. But they should also have individual interests and do some activities that are different, without their spouse. It keeps them "interesting" to each other, and makes the time together better. It keeps them in touch with other friends, and even allows them to make new friends. You have to keep being an individual in a marriage, and not just part of a "couple".
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