Tired :(
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Tired :(
| Mon, 07-26-2010 - 2:21pm |
I'm just feeling really worn down lately, some of which is due to my A.
| Mon, 07-26-2010 - 2:21pm |
I'm just feeling really worn down lately, some of which is due to my A.
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Many, many ((((hugs)))) to you Jane!
anotherseyes
AE-Yep, it is ALL self-induced...that's why it drives me nuts!
I think if you dont know why you changed from happily married to having two affairs , the reason may be that deep down you want to get out of your marriage . May be you dont find a nice & wonderful husband attractive , or you were never in love with him
or you have outgrown him. All these reasons are justified .
Many times affairs happen only to get rid of current partner . See if everything is good you have no excuse to leave , but once there are other men , Ddays in picture you and your spouse have genuine reasons to end the marriage . So this could be your motivation too .
As to how you would explain if it comes to light , I think you will need to mention some of the shortcomings of your partner .
Oh wow, how I can identify with what all of you are saying. I love my H, but I love my AP. But I really wish I didn't love AP. I know he cares for me and I'm very glad he either really doesn't love me or will just not admit it because then we'd really be in a mess. His avoidance of love is what is keeping both of us sane. I can't leave this marriage because there is no reason to. I love DH, we never fight, we do things together.
AP and I are like fire and ice. He frustrates the hell out of me at times but yet I love him and just can't leave him alone. We've been friends for nearly 30 years and I hate to lose that. Our sex is phenomenal. And I've lost the spark for DH. We have sex, but it's nothing like when AP and I get together. I get jealous of his wife and all she has with him. But yet, I wonder if AP and I would make a great couple in RL. I still want him. I need him. I love him. As much as I love him, I wish I could go back 4 years to when he and I were just friends, not lovers. This A was supposed to help me add a spark my boring life. It has just complicated it so much. I want to go back. Life was so much simpler then. And I wasn't so tired...
Sorry, if some of this doesn't make sense. I've had a little too much wine tonight to try to dull the emotions but they've come out anyway.
I apologize for rambling on. Here is the only place I can talk about AP and my feelings. I avoid talking to him about this because I don't really want to burden him or make him uncomfortable. I am meeting with AP for a brief get together tomorrow morning and that's all I can think about.
His avoidance of love is what is keeping both of us sane.
I totally agree with this!
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