Tonite's the Night!
Find a Conversation
Tonite's the Night!
| Sat, 04-17-2004 - 8:47am |
This will be the first time that MM and I will have the whole night together. We've rented a hotel room in another town so there's little chance of running into someone we know. This will also be the first time we've actually done "it." I'm very excited and, to my surprise, a little freaked out, too. I've never been with anyone but my H. I wonder how this will change things...between my H & me, between my MM & me, within myself. I keep thinking of that saying that cartographers of old would put on uncharted territory..."Beyond this place, there be dragons." I think that somehow I always thought that I would never let it get this far...that I would end it, turn around and go back to my life. That there would be an invisible line that I wouldn't cross. Yet here I am and there's the line and I'm getting ready to step over it.
But the thing is that I know in my heart of hearts that it's a line I WANT to cross. I'm choosing to do this. And I know that in a few hours, none of this will matter. All that will matter is that moment and there will be no place I'd rather be than with him.
So I don't know if I'm necessarily asking for advice here or if I just needed to sort out my feelings. If you have advice on how to calm my nervous self down, I'd love to hear it. (I'm already planning on having a couple of drinks at dinner!) And if you don't have advice, thank you for letting me ramble! You all are great!
Happy day!
Jess

Pages
AND YOU NEED TO LIGHTEN UP TOO!!!!
Edited 4/19/2004 9:15 am ET ET by julietsfate
Now go to your corners and when you're ready...kiss and make up.
:)
Pages