TURN ON FOR THE W
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TURN ON FOR THE W
| Mon, 05-10-2004 - 2:25pm |
I am dying to ask everyones opinion on this question:
It seems that most of us on these posts, do not have much physical
contact with our MM's. Most of the posts I have read only
kissing, touching seem to be the max, with a few exceptions.
So, has anyone wondered after your with your MM kissing, hugging
touching etc, do you think then he goes home and makes
love with his W, thinking of you as a "turn on"?
Sorry to be so blunt, but that is what I am thinking now, and
I do not want to.
Bunny

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Well, I am intimate with my MM and I know I'm a turn on for him. (It definitely works both ways, too.)
He doesn't often make love with his W, (from what I understand). She has arthritis, and is very sedate in style. I've never asked him if he thinks about me when he touches her, but he might. I can tell you though - he's not thinking about her for long when he's touching me.
Want me to ask him? We're meeting tomorrow.
Cazrida
Much has been made of the men's ability to compartmentalize. And maybe that's what I'm doing. But sex with one has nothing to do with sex with the other. If I was turned on by my OW I wasn't going to substitute my W.
To be just completely honest I feel like that would have been the height of unfair and disrespectful to all three of us. I have my faults and this A is certainly evidence of some of those weaknesses. But I just couldn't do that.
Besides... how am I going to think such perfectly wicked pornographic thoughts about my OW, know she's thinking the same (and sometimes worse!) and then go home to twenty minutes of missionary sex? LOL.
rain
Soleil
I also know that we've gone stretches that we can't see each other and the "heated" vm's and phone talk leave us both turned on - in the past I know that he's taken care of his needs by his W and I guess I have to. It's just part of playing in this ballgame of two M people having an A.
Anyway, he definitely hasn't come right out and said it, but I do have a sense about it. And let's be honest....I'm thinking of him while I'm with my H as well.
Twisted, man. =)
KC
barefoot
My xMM and I were very physical with each other, and each time was better than the last. One passionate kiss would nearly put him over the edge. Sadly, he has said that he hasn't kissed like that in over 15 years. During those times when we couldn't physically be together, we would send each other very naughty emails. In my mind, and his, this correspondence did nothing but fuel the fire for the next time we could meet.
His W is not an overly affectionate person, and in reading Rain's post to this thread, I immediately recognized what xMM must have felt, and he has admitted to me that he would never get away with doing the things we've done together, with his W.
However, our A and our sexual relationship was never far out of his mind. He was not able to compartmentalize, so to speak. So during those rare times, that his W would "feel the need", thoughts of me were on his mind. Unfortunately they did not act as a turn on, but only reinforced the guilt he felt. As Rain said, it would be disrespectful to hop into bed with W, while having thoughts about OW. It was due to this further act of betrayal on xMM's part, that his mind controlled his penis and W began to have suspicions as to why after 3 weeks of not "getting any", he would have a problem "raising the bar".
As you can imagine, this sexual dysfunction weighed even more heavily on his mind and on his member, and is what eventually led to the demise of our relationship. I do have to say, in my own defense, that there was never a problem of "hard" luck when we were together and I could get him squirming in his chair with one email composed out of longing for him "Psst, I'm not wearing any panties today!" LOL
These are my thoughts, and now I think I will go jump in a cold shower.
Take care
Red
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