Ugggggg.....
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Ugggggg.....
| Sat, 11-29-2008 - 8:58pm |
Uggggg....I am going insane. AP and I have not talked since Wed. He went to FL for Thanksgiving and went fishing with his family. I thought that we might talk some while he was gone but we haven't. I hate it. It has been the longest Thanksgiving ever. Tomorrow is going on 4 days now. I tried to call today but voicemail. I have sent a few emails and texts...but nothing. I hate this. Thursday was the was the first day we haven't talked since Sept 13th. We have talked everyday until Thanksgiving came. Now we have gone four days without talking. I understand though just don't like going this long without talking. I knew it would happen but I guess I should have prepared myself a little better. I am sure we all have this problem during this time of year. I just can't wait until he gets back.

The joys and lows of being in an A. The NC, planned or otherwise. Holidays are always going to be bad as the opportunity for communication dwindles with family around 24/7. Hang in there, he will contact you when it is safe. What works for me when AP drops contact is that he is not risking our A by being in contact with me when it is not safe to do so.
Pisces
I can understand where you're coming from, but honey, - if you're gonna survive this A you really need to get used to periods of NC. You need to talk to him about this and you have to agree on what's acceptable for the both of you. You must try to get used to periods of no contact whatsoever. Especially during holiday periods. He will contact you when he feels it's safe doing so. Being in touch every day is not necessarily the norm. It's more like the exception. What you expect and what you get is not always the same. If you give your AP a hard time about this it might be considered needy and nagging. But either way you need to let him know how you feel. Not about this NC, but NC in general.
My AP works abroad and when he's at home he's a full time dad - 4 kids. We agreed I needed to be able to manage 3 days of NC without going bonkers. I said I would, but we agreed on no longer than 7 days unless in special occations. This summer he was going on vacation with his family for 3 weeks. Roadmtriop through Europe. We agreed on NC as it would be very difficult for him to contact me safely. It was hard as hell, on both of us. But not as hard as it could have been because we talked about it beforehand.
The most important thing in an A is C O M M U N I C A T I O N.
NC for no reason at all, the controlling kind, the mindgames kind is NOT acceptable.
But again, talk about it before it becomes a problem.