Use of the word 'Cheater'

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Use of the word 'Cheater'
8
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 9:02am

How do you feel about it? To me it sounds very degrading.I would hate to call my AP a 'cheater'.I would rather say wayward spouse.We both fell in love and we are choosing to stay in the A till the circumstances change.'Cheater' sounds derogatory ( to me ).

Just my thought of the day :)

OTH,I wouldnt mind if the betrayed spouse was using the term.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-29-2010
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 9:10am

I dunno, I think it's pretty accurate, by my definition of "cheater" anyway.

Here's a definition of "cheater" online:

S: (n) deceiver, cheat, cheater, trickster, beguiler, slicker (someone who leads you to believe something that is not true)

"Someone who leads you to believe something that is not true".

We are leading our spouses to believe that our only romantic relationship is with them. That is not true. By this definition, we are cheaters.

It's not a pretty definition, and there are others we can use that "pretty it up" and are accurate, but this definition fits too.

Proud to be a





You've

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 9:13am
I guess we all are aware of the dictionary definition and I didnt ask for that,lol! Thanks for going online to paste the definition,lol!
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2009
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 10:18am

I think it's definitely fair to call ourselves "cheaters".

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 10:29am
Thats interesting.I am not sure what makes it right for you to say that about yourself even though what you are saying is correct.I have too much respect for my MM to say that to him.I love him too much I guess and our A is not an ego booster,void filler,cake eating etc.We are pretty serious about it unlike many on the board and it hurts to see how some can play with feelings.I am not judging anyone,just my own personal thoughts.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2010
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 11:14am
I agree. What we do should not be sugar coated. It's wrong and it's not fair to our spouses.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2008
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 2:38pm

(( Hugs )) NO relationship can work w/o mutual respect.

Mail me if you want to talk as I do remember you from long ago as I may not post here.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2009
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 4:17pm

I'm sorry Doll, but I have to burst your bubble.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2010
Fri, 04-16-2010 - 4:18pm

In response to your post. I couldn't of summed it up better and the very words you used to explain your A is the very same way I feel and have said it in my mind countless times. I have a great life and feel I'am not worthy of all the love I've been given and truly feel because I love buddhism that I will get my karma in my next life. I'm so terrified of this and it's so hard to stop.


 


Much peace & Love,


Rayne


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