Very Down Today

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Very Down Today
6
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:02pm
I saw my attorney this morning and I am feeling lower than ever. She thinks I have a strong case....an excellent case against my H for mental and verbal abuse. She said I would most probably get legal and physical custody based on what I told her. I'm not counting my chickens before they are hatched, however. Then we start talking about retainers and the fees. I don't have near the money they want to get started.....and I've spoken to a total of three attorneys (different areas, all the same price range). I am at a loss. I need out of this situation, but feel like I am trapped...I can't afford to get out of the situation. Does anyone have anything they can suggest to me....all I want to do is cry.

Oh, and to top it all off...MM is out of town for his grandmother's funeral....I won't even be able to talk to him until (at least) the middle of next week. I am beside myself.


Edited 3/18/2004 4:03 pm ET ET by noregretsyet

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-14-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:09pm
I know how you feel. I am having a bad day also.

I guess from my perspective, at least your case is strong. Odds are you're going to get what you want in the end. Now money can be a tricky issue, especially when you're trying to start all of this without your H knowing. I guess I would try one of two things. See if you have any relatives (parents maybe) that would be willing to loan you the money. If not, talk to the attorneys about your situation and see if they would be willing to work with a smaller retainer. I would think they would be somewhat flexible. I'm sure you'll figure this out one way or another. Just be strong and think positive thoughts. Good luck with everything.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:18pm
Thanks omahamm.....My mom doesn't have the money and my dad is debating over loaning it to me as it is a lot of money up front. He wants to help because he sees what my H is doing to me and the kids, but I don't know what's going to happen. I am so distraught about the possibility of yet another week going home to H....
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:22pm
I'm sorry, honey. Thinking about you so much. I know it seems bleak, but there has to be a way. Have you asked the attorney about going after H for attorney fees? That's fairly common in my State. Perhaps if your dad knows he will get the money back fairly soon, he would be more willing to loan. I'm sending positive $$$ thoughts your way (I'm sure it would be better if it was actual $$$). Sure wish I could. Here's a hug instead... Attorneygirl out there? Any thoughts?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-16-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:24pm
Yes, my attorney definitely said she would go after H for attorney's fees. Dad is still thinking about it. Man...I need a good cry!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 3:27pm
You go ahead... you deserve it? A good cry then a stiff drink! Then some 'down' time with your guy. Honey -- it's all gonna happen, hang in there!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-22-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 4:28pm
Unfortunately I don't have any advice for you, but I did want to send some encouragement your way. Have faith that things WILL work out. I know, I know - I'm giving advice that I'm absolutely incapable of following myself right now. But still. You ARE making progress, taking concrete steps to better your life. That's a huge thing in and of itself. Hang in there!

((((HUGS)))) to you!

GB2