Want OM all to myself!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2004
Want OM all to myself!
4
Tue, 03-16-2004 - 9:07pm
Hello everyone! I have been in an A since November and have posted a few times in here before. I'm sooo confused (that should be a surprise-hehehe!) I think I have been confused since November! I have really strong feelings for OM (who has been in a 3 year relationship-not married!) I think I have come to the point where I want OM all to myself! What should I do? Should I tell him how I feel? Any advice would be appreciated!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 10:48am
Yikes! Were there any rules when you started? Any expectations of a long-term or exclusive relationship? I guess I would perhaps initiate some conversation in that regard if I felt strong about it. Then kind of see where it goes. I think you'll know if you've overstepped his boundaries.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 11:06am
Honda honey, are you single? Because if you are, I would think you are perfectly in your rights to tell this other single person your feelings for him.

And let him decide if he wants to be with you and break up with his g/f. You are obviously not happy with the fact that he has the g/f and don't want to be #2 for him.

However, if you are M, I don't think you really have a leg to stand on here. You can't offer him a fulltime relationship anyways, it wouldn't be fair to try and limit him from having one with g/f.

Dusty
xxxx
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2004
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 7:09pm
Dusty, if you are married this is a big mistake, take it from me!. A single OM and married woman are a recipe for Trouble! He has nothing to lose if things don't go his way, while you have everything to lose. My OM had a GF but was obsessed with me and almost destroyed my marriage. After getting to know him better (it lasted 15 months) I wanted out, but he would not let me go. UGH!

I would rethink this relationship. Your OM is having his cake and eating it too. In the end your just going to feel bad about the whole thing. Trust me on this. Maybe you are in an affair to boost your self esteem but a guy who's screwing two women (pardon my french) is not going to give you that! He may tell you wonderful things to keep you on the hook (extra, good sex is hard to give up) but you will just get more and more upset that he's not giving up the GF because if you are as wonderful, special, talented ect. as he says you are, he WOULD give her up. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2003
Thu, 03-18-2004 - 8:23am
It was actually Hondagal who started this thread, I am M and seeing a MM. She never did answer whether she was single or M. But I agree with you, single OM and MW is not a good mix. If she were single also though, then I think she has the right to tell him she'd like more out of the relationship.

Dusty
xxxx