Wanting an affair with, I think...
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Wanting an affair with, I think...
| Tue, 02-24-2004 - 11:22am |
I am married successful working mom who has come to know a similiar type man. There is some type of spark between us but I am unsure of what he thinks about me... My friend says that he may be interested but either chooses not to pursue because of what he could lose or may be unable to pursue. Please don't think I'm vain- but I am considered a very attractive woman. I would never want either one of us to leave our spouses/current lives but I think we could bond and have something together that our neither spouse can give us. There are so many details of course, but how can I tell if there is something worth pursuing? What is his interest is? I am willing to give this a 'go'. I am 40, he 43 so we are no 'kids' at what there is we both have on the line... Help?

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Seeing him for lunch is not the best way to "get over him", hon. You are clearly trying to keep contact and give it every possible shot and I have to give you credit for admitting this and not being in denial. Sure invite him to lunch, why not? He might accept it on a purely friendly basis and then you will know that this is all he wants. He might decline, and if he does - so be it, and it should make no difference to you why he declined. Either way you will have your answer and your "closure." But to get this anwer you have to ask. That's by far better than wondering "what if" and driving yourself nuts for an indefinite period of time. And - he might accept and you just might get what you want.
V.
I don't have much time to post this a.m. I'll try to get here later today. But for now, you are sweet to ask, but really you are already helping me with my pain. It helps to know that there is another woman like me out there and I'm not the only crazy one (lol). It helps with my pain to post and get it all out so to speak. I read what Boston said to you. You should ask MM to lunch, or else the not knowing will drive you crazy. Don't ask too far in advance like it's planned. Make it a casual thing. BUT, be prepared that he could accept and cancel later. That is the worst.
What grabs me the most with you and makes me cringe is you are doing the pursuing, like I did, and in the end that hurts your pride. I read here recently, "the one who loves the least holds all the power". Think about that. I will be back later, C
V -- you don't have to know if MM is attracted to his W -- what is the point of that?
CL-Gurlfriend50
Co-CL of My Affair Support Board
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