Wants to talk in person?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2012
Wants to talk in person?
3
Wed, 11-27-2013 - 10:47am

I have been doing a dance with a guy for almost six months. I am a MW and he is in a relationship. He never seems overly loyal to this relationship. He just sort of goes with the flow. Anyway, we have flirted quite a lot and talked about sex quite a bit. He seems anxious when he is alone with me, so I thought he was afraid I would make a move on him. I told him I never make a first move, and he is safe from me putting him in a siutation that may lead to something he feels guilty about. He says he is more worried about putting me in a situation and doesn't want things to be awkward for me. All I want is something physical on the side right now. But I don't know if he is the type to go for it. He says we need to talk about it "in person", so I don't know why it has to be that way. Why can't it be over the phone? If he wants to back off, wouldn't he just want to do it over the phone? I am going to lay my cards on the table when we talk and hope he is up for what I propose, but I can't be entirely sure. Anyone have any insight?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Wed, 11-27-2013 - 12:40pm

Given all the weirdos and phoneys on the internet, I would NEVER agree to anything or any kind of "friendship" unless I'd seen the person fact to face, and that would be done with caution!  It would have to be in a public place, and my friends and family would know where I was going to be (I understand that you can't tell the world where you'll be, but at least one trusted friend).  Maybe he's worried you won't be as you described yourself......ie: younger, older, weighing 400 pounds, etc.........he wants to see you before he commits to anything.  I can't blame him!  You may be perfectly honest, but many aren't.  Have you ever seen the TV show "Catfish"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2012
Wed, 11-27-2013 - 1:36pm
Wait, what? No! We know each other IRL. Not an internet date! Sorry for the confusion! I'm just not sure if he is open to turning our EA into a PA. He wants to talk about "us" in person. I just don't know what that means!
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2013
Wed, 11-27-2013 - 8:43pm

Sounds like maybe he wants to be able to read your reaction and/or vice versa. Could be that he wants to discuss guidelines/rules. I would go for it.