we said good bye.
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we said good bye.
| Fri, 12-05-2008 - 4:19pm |
i called him today. we talked for a while about many different things. he's a former athlete, he's really into what he use to do, but he wants to train. the training would be for his church. he said to me, i can't do good for other people, look in the mirror at my self, feel good about myself if i'm not doing right. he's right. he always tried to block his feelings off from me, fight them, we've gotten way to close. he wants to do the right thing, he wants to have classes for his church. he's very religious. i told him i have a small christmas gift for him that i would like to give him. i know he wont see me so i can give it to him. i told him that i loved him, i know this is the best for the both us. i told him, i wont messanger him, or email him. we talked for 2 hours, i didn't want to let him go, and i cried. we said our goodbyes. it didn't end bad or nasty. he said to me he never wanted to hurt me in any way. i told him we've tried before, but never could make it work because we had easy access to one another. now we don't. i know it's good bye for good.i just wish i never fell i love with him. i never felt this way about any other man in my life. i wish him the best, and god bless him.

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i just want to say how sorry i am.
My heart goes out to you. I understand. My EAP feel guilt too and will get close to me and then pull away. He won't even see me and we have been talking for a year. I have known him since I was 13, he was also my first love. I haven't seen him in 13 years. He is like hot and cold, yes and no.
I too, am active in my church and I also deal with the right and wrong, but our A is still an EA. So, that helps me rationalize things. I have decided though to pull back, focus on my family, me, and see what happens.
Everyone is here for you. Just take one day at a time. It's so wonderful that you both ended well and that you truly care and respect one another.
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