What to do about X-mas party

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
What to do about X-mas party
20
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 2:03pm
Little re-cap : MM and I work together. He and his W and me and my H always sit together at the party for the past 2 years. The A has only been going on a month or so, but at past parties we couldn't keep our eyes off each other and were noticed by our H & W along with just about everyone there. Even though nothing was going on. We have been incredibly attracted to each other from day 1 when I started working here, but just have acted on it. Anyway my dillema of sorts:

The first party we had I wore a slinky black dress and my H said I looked "not like the other ladies there". Which was not true. The difference was I was the youngest woman there and had to dance w/ one of my co-workers, not MM, as a joke for the last door prize alone on the dance floor w/ all eyes on us. So we got alot of attention that year, especially me.

Anyway last year, to avoid conflict I wore a nice silk blouse and black skirt, nothing to draw attention to myself and appease my H. (Still didn't keep MM's eyes off me though-:wink:)

So this year I bought a "knock-em dead" black dress because I want to torture MM that night while he is there with his W. This dress shows every curve on my body. I have been going to the tanning bed and have gotten my tan back and am going all out w/ hair and nails too. One problem....my H. We have had several arguments about what I am going to wear. He said I should dress like MM's W does ! LOL! I refuse to dress down this year. He says I am dressing up for someone...I said yeah...myself ! Do you all agree that he is being just plain possesive and acting out of jealously ? Even though unbeknownst to him he has a reason to be ?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:10pm
listen honey, if your girlfriends don't make you feel good about yourself, then who's left to do the job, other than your MM!! and good for you that he's that type of man who will and does make you feel wanted, beautiful and desirable, without being intimidated by you!!

and tell your stupid, ass H that he better start appreciating you, or others just might!!

go to that damn party, dressed to the hilt, and enjoy yourself!

i'm having a holiday party with BF on saturday night, and MM and his W, along with 35 of our friends will be there and you can bet the house that i'm dressing way, way, way up and enjoying ALL the attention. MM already knows i'm wearing really tight clingy low slung pants with a body-hugging top and no undies and he's dying!! between you and me, we better cross our fingers neither one of us gets into trouble with MM!!

go for it,

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2002
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:14pm
If you know your OM likes to look at you, why do you want to "torture" him? Sorry, but this sounds more like an attempt to grab attention from not just your OM but also everyone else, and to make other women look bad by comparison. That sounds a little insecure to me. It's also not a good idea in a situation with coworkers who you hope might take you seriously.

The sexiest women aren't necessarily the ones who flaunt everything they've got.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:18pm
I don't agree- I think that confidence is sexy and if dressy pretty and feeling good makes her confident than she will eb the sexiest women in the room!!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:19pm
shouldi, i don't get that from blue's posts. she wants to look good at the party so why shouldn't she wear the dress she looks good in. is that "flaunting everything she's got"? after all, it is a nighttime party. should she hide her assets so all the other women at the party feel less insecure? and her MM is all for her wearing something she looks and feels good in!

where did you get that idea from her posts??

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:56pm
Wear the dress, without panties, and knock-em dead. Be sure to tell MM that you are not wearing panties!
Avatar for nomoreregrets
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 4:58pm
I say wear that black sexy dress and the highest "Knock me down and F^%^ me heels" you can find! Have fun! NMR
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-12-2003
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 5:34pm
I will not be the only one with a sexy dress on. My boss showed me her dress and both of ours are sexy. All of the other girls here in the office love our dresses and are dressing similarly to us.

I plan on telling MM when I get there that there's nothing on underneath and maybe we can steal a few minutes alone. I hope so. If our stubborn selves would have given in before now there have been many chances at the last party to be alone with each other. :o)

I love the way he makes me feel about myself and that's one of the reasons we are together. He makes me want to look good and have all the confidence in the world. That's what attracted him to me. H just brings me down. No fun at all. :o( I know I'm not god's gift to men but MM makes me feel like I'm god's gift to him ! He's so good. Too bad he's gone for the day ! :o(

I will let you all know how the party goes !

Hugs for making me feel better !

~Blue

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2002
Wed, 12-10-2003 - 6:02pm
I don't know Blue, so maybe I'm reading things into her post that you didn't, because you post here more often than I do. When I read things like "I want to torture MM that night while he is there with his W," I get the feeling that she's trying to outshine the wife. And a dress that "shows every curve" usually isn't office party-appropriate - it's show-offy and designed to get attention, which usually is great for clubbing but a bad idea at office parties, regardless of the time of day they're held. I'm no prude or frump, but I'd be wary of dressing too sexy at an office party. But since Blue mentioned that her boss is also wearing something sexy, she must go to much different office parties than I do!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 12-11-2003 - 1:15pm
hey shouldi -- office parties are all different but i've dressed UP and DOWN for mine, at various times in my life. i feel if it's a day-time affair, less skin should be hanging out, but night-time, more formal affairs call for a more dramatic look. and that's what i'd go with, something that shows off my curves, but not everything i own, which is what i get from blue's description of her dress.

and the "torture" comment seems to have more to do with making her MM want her more knowing just what's under (or not under!!) that dress. making the W feel jealous is going to go with the territory since MM's W doesn't dress like that, is probably already feeling insecure and is jealous anyway.

so blue should be so considerate of everyone else's feelings in the future that she covers up completely in pants and a sweater and flats! that's not gonna happen on saturday night!

i feel this is one of those cases of "overthinking"! JMHO.

gurl

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2002
Fri, 12-12-2003 - 4:24pm
Again, I think you just know more about the background here than I do, if you know that much about her OM's wife (that she doesn't dress like that, is probably already feeling insecure and is jealous anyway), so I'll defer to popular opinion. ;) My OM's wife is not at all insecure or jealous, and he loves her and me regardless of what we wear - if we both came to a party wearing plastic bags, he wouldn't care - so obviously I'm envisioning a situation that's entirely different from Blue's. (I also know that if I showed up at my office party wearing something that showed off every curve, it would make people pretty uncomfortable - even though they have all seen me in a bathing suit and have absolutely nothing to hide - it just wouldn't "feel" right at a holiday party like ours.)

Wearing pants and a sweater and flats wouldn't be office-party appropriate anyway. ;)

Have a good weekend, and may everyone enjoy their office parties this year!

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