What do I/we do?
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| Fri, 03-19-2004 - 6:13pm |
Just to provide you a quick background: I am a MW- no kids having an affair with a MM- with one child. We have fallen for each other and believe that we are soul mates but due to our marriages, are frustrated on a daily basis because we don't know if we will ever be together. He is torn up about leaving his son and feels that he can't do it in the foreseeable future...if ever. I suppose I feel the same way because I am married to a wonderful man (who I am, unfortunately, not in love with and only see as a best friend). It would be very hard for me to make that decision to hurt him.
This is the issue that is facing my MM right now: He is 40 years old with a 15 month old son. It had been determined (before I was in the picture) that he does not want his son to be an only child. His wife is/has been pressuring him for the past few months to try to have a second child. He loves his son so much and feels an obligation to give his son a sibling. BUT now that I am in the picture, he doesn't know what to do. He tells me that because of how much he loves me, every decision he makes will affect our relationship and he is not sure which way to go. Due to some circumstances...time is ticking and he needs to make a decision about having this second child SOON.
He is emotionally torn up right now because his choices are:
1. Make the determination to stay for his son, give-in and provide his son with a little brother or sister...and possibly lose me. (I don't know if I can stay if he decides to do this)
2. Think that he "may" have the courage to leave someday which would mean that they are better off stopping at one child.
Since we both don't know what the future will bring, it is literally tearing him up thinking that our/his marriage/his son's future is in his hands. I don't know what to do or what to even tell him. For some of you with kids...can you please share your input?
I'm sorry to babble on and hope that I provided you a "clear" enough picture of what the issues are that we/my MM is facing.

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Cazrida
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